ShawnMendes entered Wattpad.

49

~ A five-step-plan. ~

[Thursday]
As planned, Thursday Aaliyah and I meet. We've had planned to go into town, so that I could show her a bit around, but at the end the weather got bad, so we went back to my appartment.
When we enter the room, Aaliyah looks curiously around. She seems to like my appartment, and I have to admit, I like it either, even though I never liked it that much that I wished I would.
I guess it's just the spirit that is missing – it's like my missing connection to my study-field – I've never really got home in this town, probably because of my constant changing living-situation in the past.
Something just is missing, I guess.

"I like that really much", Aaliyah points to the black quote on the wall. It's: "A kind soul hears music in every word other people say, when other people only hear words."

"I like that too", I say and think of how often Amy laughed about that sentence. She never really understood the meaning I guess.
I hem. "My former best friend always said, it would be too kitschy, but I like it even though. - She once even asked me, to bring her a brush, so that she could paint the wall white."

Aaliyah stares at me for a moment, then she says: "But you didn't do that, as I can observe."

"No, I didn't do it."

"It does really hurt, that she's acted like that, and that she treats you like that, doesn't it?", Aaliyah looks at me sympathetically. "I'm really sorry, that your friendship ended up like this. Just because of my brother."

"No no, it's not because of your brother", I answer. "At least not only because of him." I look at the wall again and then say: "Afterwards I think, that our friendship was over long before he'd write me on Wattpad. I mean it was a very close friendship we've had, but now, I think that I was never a respected part of that; that I never really knew, what it would mean to be part of a friendship on eye level. It's just, that I, little by little realize, how less her opinion about me was, and how often I was the one who agreed, even though, I didn't want to study politics or go to the fifth house-party in a row or eat a veggy-burger. Ya know?"

"You really just studied what she wanted you to?" Aaliyah looks astonished.

"To be fair, she didn't force me", I say. "But she always knew, I didn't like it that much, and she took me under pressure, just that I did choose the same study-field as her."

For a second, we both keep silent, then Aaliyah looks again at the quote. "I think it fits perfectly for you both. – Your the kind soul and Amy's the deaf person, if that isn't clear."

I laugh. "Thank you. I take this as a compliment."

"You should." Aaliyah rolls her eyes. "I really don't want to have Amy as my future sister-in-law."

I gulp. Damn. That did hurt.
I need a second, then I ask: "Do you think, this is possible?"

"That Shawn and Amy are gonna end up together?" Aaliyah looks thoughtful. Than she shakes her head. "I don't think so. But you know, Shawn and I ... do have problems at the moment. We don't talk that much as usual."

"Is it because of me?" I feel so bad now. Gosh, I destroyed a good and healthy sibling-relationship! The fans gonna hate me. But lucky for them: I would hate myself for that already without them.

"No, no! You didn't destroy that! If somebody tried to, than it was Amy! – Or to be fair, it was Shawn himself, too. And I am not that unblamebale for the whole situation." Aaliyah looks at me serious. "Just to make that clear Mandy: That Shawn and I are going through some things at the moment is not something you're capable for. My brother and I have a strong relationship and you don't need to worry about if you destroyed something."

I breath out relieved. Then I hem. "Okay."
I look at the kitchen. "You wanna eat or drink something?"

"Oh, no, thank you. I'm fine. But maybe a cocoa?"

While making two cocoas in the kitchen, I look outside. It's raining and snowing all together. It's a mixture of gray and white and again, I think of how the winters in Suffolk always were. The autumn was rainy and blue, and the winter was just snow and glassy.

"What about your father?" Aaliyah looks a bit curious around in my appartment, as I would hide him right in the next corner.

"No father", I say.

"Oh, is he..."

"No, just no noteworthy father", I answer with a small smile.

"I'm sorry to hear that", Aaliyah says.

I shrug. "It's okay now."

We both know that it's never okay, but she doesn't say anything more about that topic, and changes instead the content of our conversation. "So, Amy." She sits down on the corner of my couch. "What are we gonna do with that? I have to admit that I'm really concerned. Shawn doesn't listen to me anymore the way he did before he met her. The whole elevator situation was kinda ... messy. Not what I planned to be honest. But at least, you both did talk."

"We'll yeah, we did talk. And we didn't. I've already told you: I was a bit too much distracted by the fact that I was stucked in the living hell."
I roll my eyes. "So instead of using my chance to talk to to your brother, I just yell at him. And we did fight again." I look into my cup. I don't tell Aaliayh, that Shawn held my hand, and that he looked me in the eyes, as he would see me for the first time for real. I just can't explain how it felt to be near him, to talk to him, finally. "I wish, I had acted different, but I didn't. And he didn't, too. So I really don't know what to do now", I shake my head, and I'm feeling bad again, because all this drama seems to destroy a good brother-sister-bond. "I'm so sorry. About all of this."

"It's not all your fault as I already told ya."

"No, I know, but it feels like it is." I stare at the wall. "I really wanna fix this."

"Yeah, me too", Aaliyah smiles. "I really don't want her to become the girlfriend of my brother."

Me either. I look down.

Aaliyah takes another sip of her cocoa and puts her cup down. "C'mon Mandy, we're gonna fix this. All we need, is just a plan."

"A five-step-plan?" I grin, and Aaliyah laughs. "Exactly."