Outside, I take deep breaths. When I'm cooling down I start to realize my environment, and I observe very fascinated the bustling activities around me. There are many people working here right behind the stage where Shawn performs. Night for night they have to be the ones who are responsible for a funktionale technology - sound- and light-engineering. Security guards, stylists for hair, make-up, all that stuff.
They all are more or less in the background, never seen by the crowd or the spotlight but responsible for the great evening they all have.
For a moment I forget why I'm here. Shawn, Amy, everything.
These people here probably travel with Shawn, they celebrate his successes, they support him, and - at least - in some way they are almost all working for him. But maybe it's though more like a team, working together to bring great moments to the people.
Fascinating.
I plan asking Shawn about that.I am grounded again.
I should go inside, now, tell him the truth. That I am the one he wrote with.
Cause I am the one he wrote with.
[Flashback]
[01:40 pm - Shawn Mendes wrote you a new message]
📩
Hey, You're awake?📨
[01:42 pm]
Hey, yes, I am. What about you? (Dumb question I know, but either way. What's going on?)Still working.
Working?! At 01:40 in the morning? Are you okay?
Well, yeah I'm working. At least I guess.
You guess?! How can you guess if you're working? So either you are working or you aren't, right?.
If it was that easy. o_-
Trying to write a song. Honestly, tried to write many songs the last months. Doesn't work that well.—
I really can imagine Shawn sitting in his penthouse-apartment in Toronto at his bright piano in joggers and trying to find the right chords to put in the right place. I see the moonlight falling on his fingers on the keyboard and on his face, enlightening the thoughtful face of someone searching and trying to find the right melody to the music that's in his heart.
Not that I speak out of experience. At least not with the Toronto apartment. But writing music at night is something, I can really relate to.
—📨
I understand. So tell me what's going on in your mind?📩
I don't know. I'm trying to connect with all the music-thing. The industry and the people and the writing of music in general.Okay. I'm listening.
Having the feeling, I lost the connection to my fans and don't know if they still like my music as they once did. It was a mental break-down two years ago, and I'm not totally over it I guess. Maybe the fans aren't as well. I reached 80 million followers on Instagram this year but it doesn't make me feel more sure or more confident about that.
That's really much.
Yeah, maybe. But I don't care about that, and as long as I don't produce new music they just follow me for all that was.
I meant: that's really much
you're thinking about.Oh. Yeah.
- But 80 million Follower are much, too, of course. ;) (*thinks of her 20 followers*)
I would follow you if you'd want to. You just need to tell me your name of course.
No no, Mendes. I won't.
I could just google you. Either Amy or Mandy Riverdale. One must be right.
Don't.
Why not? It would be fun! ;)
Just don't, okay?! I don't like that. And I didn't google you as well.
Okay, okay, I won't. Promise. It's at least under a week until we meet. So I'm gonna deal with that.
You better do.
Even though it's a little bit unfair that you know so much about me and I know so less about you, not even your second name, cause you have you're friend telling you everything about me.
I have to be honest: when she was talking in the past about you, I was kinda not listening. I was always more interested in the real world and the real people. And I love your songs, but I don't care about your private life. At least I didn't before we startet writing. Not that you get that wrong.
I didn't get it wrong. And it's good to hear. :)
So, how's tour going? Are you excited to visit so many different places? Or do you see anything of them? I mean the town your playing in, the cities you're passing.
Honestly, I really don't see a lot of them. It's always just "here's the hotel, there's the stadium, this is your schedule, see you at 12 for your vocal lessons. 17:00 pm is entry, so be better punctual for your dress rehearsal. And don't forget, to eat!".
Oh my gosh.
Yeah. It's quite a lot. But now when I'm gonna be in Toronto, it will be way more stressfree. I will have a week for myself and I will spend some time with my family at home. Maybe go on a party, or two, you know?
Sounds pretty good. Just make sure, you're not working all the night and be stressing out over some lyrics. Cause you know how it goes, don't you?
What do you mean?
The lyrics will come to you when they think that they and you fit perfectly.
Love that. ❤️
❤️
Good night Shawn. :) And go to sleep.
Yes mother.
Okay, I'm gonna stop now
writing with you officially.You always say that.
But I'm really glad, you don't.x
I'm too.And Jane?
Yes Shawn?
Thank you for listening.
Always.
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