Yesterday I had therapy and it went. Okay. Just okay. But the past few weeks has got me thinking there's someone else who needs it even more than I do. Eleanor hasn't been the same in a while. She's just. Different. She's always talking about people leaving her and asking me not to be mad at her and things like that. I miss the old Eleanor. Maybe that's my problem. I want her to be the Eleanor she was when I first started loving her. The Eleanor who didn't worry this much about what she looked like or what people thought of her. I get so frustrated sometimes. It feels like I'm doing something wrong. I never say the right thing. I never do what she wants me to. All I want is for her to see herself the way I see her, but nothing I do is good enough. Even when I think I'm doing exactly what she wants it's still wrong. It's the worst feeling.
