| Natasha Romanoff x Y/N Stark |

Chapter 17

Later we went back and I needed go explain the real and whole version to my mom and Wanda. After we put Morgan to bed they obviously wanted to know the adult version of what happened so I explained as objective as I could. Even though I tried not to, I eventually broke down and was crying again but both women just hugged me. They promised me not to say a word to either dad or Natasha. And with that a quite eventful day ended for me and I was looking forward to the next few days with mom, Wanda and Morgan.
I turned the lights of and just wanted to turn on some music when my phone buzzed.

Natasha:
What's wrong? What did you tell Morgan btw, she barley talked to me today.
Just call me if something happend. Did you have an argument with Wanda or something?

Me:
No, I didn't argue with Wanda and Morgan's gonna be normal to you again tomorrow when you see her dw.

I neither had the will or the energy to answer anything else. Not to mention something nice.
With hitting the send button I turned dnd on and just listened to the music until I slowly fell asleep.
I woke up early and found a bunch of messages from Natasha but didn't even bother to open them. If she has something to say, she's gonna do it in person.
Soon after Morgan came into my room and jumped on top of me, telling me that we're going shopping today. As I got ready and found Natasha's sweater in my closet. It caused a pang in my heart, remembering when she gave it to me but I just got myself ready. Before I left downstairs I laid said sweater infront of my door and hoped it'd be gone when I came back.
While we were out we decided to have a wellness day tomorrow and bought everything such as facemasks and even got new fluffy towles for each of us.
Wanda and I got a bubble tea at our favorite and when we brought all out bags to the car we decided to eat ramen for dinner. Morgan struggled a little with the long noodles but it was honestly too cute and after a few minutes we helped her.
All in one the day was great and even greater as a distraction from everything. Right now Wanda and I laid in her bed and watched Arrow and cuddled. It was late when I got back to my room, the sweater still laid there but I didn't pick it up. I turned off the lights and just laid there. The joy and thoughtlessness slowly faded and was again replaced by sadness, anger and overthinking. God I wish I could just vanish for some time. Stop loving, stop crying, stop thinking. Just stop existing. I felt so empty. Not the comfortable kind where you just lay there in peace and relax, no. The kind where you wanna cry and scream, throw things around you and just want to feel something good again. Something that'd fill up the empty room and the pain with something that doesn't destroys you from the inside. Nah, who am I kidding, I'll get over her. I'm better than this. I deserve better than this.
....but she's so perfect...
Ok nevermind, maybe I won't get over her that easily. I again barley slept through the night but I just accepted it. Our wellnes day started great but this time it didn't distract me. The time to relax gave me way to many opportunities to think about everything all over again. To think about her.
"Hey guys, I'm really sorry but I'm gonna leave you alone at this point. But still have a hreat, relaxing day, please." I say as I got up and made my way to the elevator.
"Hey honey, everything's alright? Why do you want to go?" my mom asked concerned.
I forced a smile as I responded "Don't worry, I just didn't sleep well and I'm getting tired. I'm just gonna take a nap"
"Ok, but eat something before you sleep, you skipped breakfast and we wanted to get lunch in half an hour"
"Yeah, will do." I know that I won't, I feel like I'm gonna throw up if I even smell food but I didn't need to worry mom more than necessary.
I didn't lie, I am tired and I didn't sleep well. But I also knew that I couldn't sleep now. I can never sleep after 12pm and before 11pm.
Again I just lay down and listened to music. It helps. Maybe not to make me happy but it was helping to comprehend all the emotions. For a short moment I thought about way to get rid of the emotional/mental pain but told myself that we swore to never do it again and that I should stick to that as long as possible.
The day went by, my mom came to tell me that dad and she needed to leave again for a few days and that they're gonna take Morgan with them.
The next day I said goodbye to my mom and Morgan and gave my little sunshine a extra long hug. "Be nice to dad and have fun, ok cupcake?" She nod and hugged me again before letting go of me to catch up with our parents as they made their way to the car. I sighed and went back to my room. Did I mention the sweater is gone? Think she got the cue and took it back. The last days I didn't even dared to go up to the roof because I was afraid that she'd be there.
I just laid there when I heard a soft knock on my door. I closed my eyes, prepared for anyone
"Yeah, come in"
"Heyyy. How about we go out drinking with Pietro tonight, huh? You definitely need something like that and Bucky would pick us up afterwards" Wanda said and smiled at me. She looked worried but seemed relieved as I agreed.
I cost me some energy but finally I got up and went to take a shower to get myself ready. Wanda texted me that we'd leave in two hours so I got plenty of time.
It felt so good to let the hot water run down my back. I sighed in satisfaction and finally relaxed. The water was a bit too hot but it kinda was like all the stress and sadness got a bit better.

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words: 1097

Here's the slightly delayed update, just forgot to upload
Remember to eat and drink enough, stay healthy ❤️🩵