Intoxicated Nights

Open heart - Chapter 15

DAPHNE

'Just stay with me'

I'm in shock. I don't know wether he is being genuine or not. Here I am, a few inches away from a body lock with anjel, and here he is begging me to stay here...with him.

I don't speak. More like I prefer not to speak. This is all too much for me. I went from trying to leave this house to now having anjel asking me to stay, even though I said no a million times. I don't understand why he won't just let me go. He gave me an option when I was at the hospital, wether I wanted to go home or come back here, and yes I chose to come back but now I want to leave...so what's stopping him from letting me go?

He lifts up his head from my shoulder and stares into my eyes. His hands raise to my forehead, I flinch not expecting him to do what he just did.
His fingers gently brush my hair back and before I can understand anything going on, he holds onto my neck and pulls me into him.
His lips brush onto mine, ending up with a deeper kiss the more he pulls me into him.
I kiss him back. Knowingly and intentionally.

Im going against everything I believe in. I said I wouldn't mess about with a man who has a fiancé, but now that this is happening, I can't seem to take myself out of it.
I want it. Badly.

I didn't know I craved something this much until it happened. I've been starving myself without knowing.

His lips move in sync with mine and soon it turns red.
All I see is the colour red. My whole vision goes blurred as I close my eyes, losing myself in his arms and touch.
I feel breathless yet that's not going to stop me from pulling away. I need this just as much as I want it.

I release myself to him, loosening my whole body in order to collide with his touch. A deep groan vibrates on my lips when I curve my hand onto his jaw to bring him closer to me. My lips dampen the more his tongue swipes on it. The sinister taste of his lips keep me locked in like it's a hypnotic dream.

Stop. Stop. Stop.

No. I need this. I can't stop.

Don't. Stop. No.

'Stay with me' I pull away from him, my lips swollen and sore. His hands don't leave my neck as he awaits for me to speak. His pupils dilated until his whole eyes turn dark. I lick my lips as I watch them dilate the more he stares at me.

I nod. Nod and agree to stay with him. Whatever he had planned with this kiss, worked. The kiss hypnotised me to stay with him and I'm mad at myself for allowing it.
I know my morals. I never let a man tell me to stay and I actually stayed. Yet here I am doing what he tells me to do because somewhere in this darn idiotic heart, I feel something towards him.

'Come on, I want to have a moment...just the two of us'
He takes my hand, leading me into the living room.
I'm trying to figure out where his change of heart came from. Why has he just acted like I finally exist?

He lets me get cozy on the couch whilst he grabs a bunch of pillows for me. For the first time, I'm defenceless. I have nothing more to say to him or to argue with him. In this moment I am weak. His attention reverted to me and now I feel helpless because it's all I ever wanted ever since we had sex. Maybe this closure will bring me and him together?

Who am I fooling. This is wrong.

I said I would never go there with him again, but here I am...again, with him beside me, having a moment together where we don't talk and just live.