Reality (Linstead AU)

Chapter 76

Another Monday afternoon before Raw, another one on one chat for a catch up with Raquel. Jay was sitting with her out in the arena, several rows back from ringside. All of the seats were empty right now – it would be hours before the building's doors were opened to fans.

"So, how are you?" Raquel asked as an opener.

"Pretty good. I've got a lot to talk to you about. Are you and Z okay?"

Raquel nodded. "Yeah, doing great. What's on your mind? Wedding plans, I hope."

Jay realised that she wanted him to open up while the going was good. As he would expect from his best friend, she knew how to read him.

"Wedding plans is one of the things, yeah. We'll come to that. First, let me get this out." Feeling anxious, he took in a deep breath and forced himself into what for some reason felt like a confession. "I started seeing a therapist this week."

"Really?" she asked in surprise. Then she put a reassuring hand on his leg for a moment. "Good for you, man. Seriously. How did you find it? Do you want to tell me what you talked about?"

"This first time? Not a whole lot, really. It surprised me. The therapist seemed to want to get to know me, and find out why I wanted to see her. By the time we got through that, the session was over before she could start pressing me on anything. I guess it'll be next time we get into properly talking about... what I want there for."

"Your childhood?" Raquel guessed.

"That's a lot of it, yeah. But not the only thing. I'm also sick of feeling like I'm not good enough for Erin, or that she might suddenly leave me. I know those things are bullshit but I think them anyway sometimes. Hell, sometimes I think you'll stop bothering about me too. That's not true either. My brain is just fucking weird."

"No, it's not. And I'm not going to stop bothering about you," she assured him, sounding a little offended by the suggestion.

"I know. Like I said, it's just how my stupid brain works. That my point. Stopping it making me think those things is what I want help with."

"Again, good for you for seeking help. I hope the therapist is able to help you. Keep me up to date with how it goes, of course."

"Thanks, I will. So, wedding plans," Jay said, finally setting into the conversation now that one of the uncomfortable subjects had been covered.

"Wedding plans," Raquel said excitedly, clapping her hands together. "I'm going to get us lined up for a suit measuring. I've looked up the best tailors in New York."

Jay was surprised, in a good way. "You did that?"

"Sure. I'm the best man. Or woman, remember." They both laughed.

"Making a mess of that request is something you're not going to let me live down," he said. It wasn't a question.

"Not a chance," Raquel said with a big smile on her face. "Okay, enough teasing. Tell me what plans you've come up with?"

"Erin wants to have the wedding at her dad's place, on the garden. There will be a very small number of invitees, and the celebrations afterwards will be in Hank and Mandy's 'orangery', whatever that is."

"I have no idea what an orangery is either," she admitted. "Must be something that rich people have. We certainly didn't have one on the ranch where I grew up. Anyway, that's how Erin wanted the wedding?"

"That's what she said. Clearly she's doing it at least partly for my benefit, but she did insist that's how she wants it."

"If that's how she wants it, that's how she wants it. Give the woman what she wants. What are you doing about the ring?"