Electric Love || Bucky Barnes X OC

Chapter 46

It was silent for a long moment and I felt the tears stinging in my eyes while the panic built in my chest. What if he just ran and didn't even come up to his room? What if he's already gone? I laid my head against the door while I pounded against it. "Please, Cyborg, please. Just let me explain, just open the door." I pleaded

The door finally opened and he had the same tears in his eyes. "You knew?"

"Yes, let me just explain everything."

"How long have you known?" he asked as he plopped down on the bed

"Do you remember when we came back from that mission where you got shot and there were a few days where I avoided you?"

"Yes, vividly especially since it was not that long ago."

"Still. That was when I found out and it took me a few days to process what happened and be able to control my face when talking to you."

"Because you would've looked at me like I was a monster?"

"No, because I was afraid you would be able to tell by my face that I knew something and then we'd have to have this conversation. I didn't want to talk about this with you, I didn't want you to know that I knew."

"But now here we are and I know that you know. How did you figure it out?"

"Broke into your files and went through every one of them until I found the video."

"You watched that? You should not have watched that."

"But I did and it's okay. I don't care, Bucky."

"You should care, you should." he yelled

He crossed the room toward me and grabbed both of my arms roughly. "But I don't."

"What is wrong with you that you don't care that you're sleeping with the person who killed your grandparents? The person who strangled your grandma, the same hands that you love around your neck strangled your grandmother and slammed your grandfather's head in. I killed them." he shook me slightly and his grip tightened slightly

"No, you did not. Hydra killed them and they just used you to do it, that's all. No part of that was your fault and you already know everything that's wrong with me. I'm fucked up and I thought you were okay with that because you're a little fucked up too. Don't make me have to go back to Tony and tell him that I lost you because of something stupid."

"Mia it's not stupid."

"It is. We're together, this is a relationship now and you don't get to bail on me because you're scared. I've accepted it and you need to accept that I can be okay with that."

"Your judgment is messed up because we've been sleeping together."

"No, we'd been sleeping together but that was before we kissed and before we agreed to give this a real chance. I made that decision knowing that information. Get over it and get over yourself."

"How are you so okay with this?"

He finally released his grip on my arms and I fought myself to not show the relief from how hard he'd been holding my arms. "Because Bucky, I want to be with you and I accept everything about you."

I reached toward him but flinched from the pain in my arm where he'd been holding me. "Did you just flinch? Did I hurt you?"

"I'm fine."

"Mi... look at your arms, look what I did to your arms."

I looked down and saw my arms were red and looked like they'd probably bruise tomorrow. To hide it I crossed my arms and moved closer to him. "It's okay, you are a lot stronger than me and it's going to happen sometimes. Everything is alright, I don't have an issue with anything and I need you to calm down."