Getting Through Life

Chapter 25: Live laugh love

Trigger warning!

Sirens. Blood. Bed.

Sirens. Blood. Bed.

Sirens. Blood. Bed.

I was repeating my mantra. I heard sirens, I saw blood, I felt a bed. I don't know for how long I was sitting here, it couldn't be long because I think I just saw Leah leave the room.

"David found him", I suddenly heard from next to me.

"What?", I asked. I think I was still in shock because nothing was really getting through to me.

"David. He found him. Apparently he needed to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. I guess oldies have a problem", Felix said. I snickered. Normally, Noah would yell something like 'Felix, my man' now. Damn, I miss him.

"He was so proud of you", I said while I let go Noah's legs slightly so I could hug my other brother a bit closer.

"I just wish I could see him grow up. Have a wife, kids, I don't know...", Felix pouted. I get it, I did too.

"You know, I bet he's making fun of us right now. Look at us. Being all sappy about him", I tried to lighten the mood. Mostly for Felix, but a little bit for myself too.

"He'd not only make fun of us. He would record it and use it against us some time later for sure", Felix went along with it too. He really would though.

"What are we going to do now?", he asked after a short period of rather comfortable silence, strange enough.

"Move on", I just said. I thought it was true, there is nothing that can bring him back. He's gone, so we have to live for him now.

"He'd want us to move on", I added.

"That's it? I don't think I can do that. Look Lou-lou, I know you have your life, but all that really helped me go on was him. I know Amanda and David try really hard, but it just isn't the same. He's gone", Felix started to cry again.

"I know, he is", I said. I didn't know how to comfort him, so I didn't. 

"Did you see Jacob anywhere?", he asked. I think they both began seeing Jacob as their brother. I mean, it's only normal from the amount of time they've spent together ever since,... well.

"He's in his room", I sighed. I didn't know much about him, what he saw or how he was handling this. I knew Amanda and David were in shock as well, Felix and I were, well this, and Leah was trying to hold everything together.

"Alright", he said and, got up? Wait, is he really about to leave us behind?

"Don't you want to stay until they take his body away?", I asked him. I wanted him to be sure, so he wouldn't regret anything later.

"I already said goodbye to him while you weren't here. I think you need to have your moment now before the cops arrive", he smiled at me. Even in the worst conditions, he is a sweetheart.

"Thanks Feels. If he wants, you can send Jacob in here as well. He also deserves a proper goodbye to his brother", I said. That is the least we can do for him.

"I'll ask him, take your time. I'll try to keep everyone out until you come out", he said while he closed Noah's door. 

"I guess it's just us now hey buddy?", I said out loud. I felt silly talking to a corpse, but I knew I needed to do this.

"When you attempted, I should've told them to be more... No. I'm not going to do this now. I guess I need to say goodbye to you, don't I? Damn boy, if you would have survived this time, I would surely beat the crap out of you for making us go through this twice. I know it's not fair to say it like that. But you kind of did...", I chuckled.