Getting Through Life

Chapter 30: Trouble in paradise

Trigger warning!

I traveled to St. George's Park. Leah called me to ask if she needed to come to my place first. I shot that idea down as soon as it left her mouth.

So, here I am. I arrived not too long ago, but I just saw a series of taxi's pass. I hope I'm not the last one to arrive, I'll already have enough attention to my name.

Oh, right. Lisa also received her first call up. But she'll be playing for the USA. So, just my luck, if I earn my first cap this camp, it'll be against Ireland or my mom, her girlfriend and my twin sister.

"Louise, you arrived!", I heard coming from behind me.

Leah. Oh no.

"Oh, hi", I answered uncomfortable.

"That's all I get after being apart for so long?", she asked somewhat offended.

"Uhm, do you remember we're still fighting?", I asked her. She couldn't have forgotten that.

"Look, do you really want to do this right here, right now?", she said annoyed.

"If you look behind me, you'll see all of your future teammates staring at us. I saw you standing here lost, and I thought I should come and say hi. But where I tried to be subtle about it, our mutual friend G shouted it for everyone to hear. Like always", she said while she tried to hug me.

Right. It appeared that I was in fact the last one to arrive.

"G always shouts", I stated but I stepped back. She didn't need to go all lovey dovey on me now. She messed up, big time.

Let me explain. She told me a while back she'd make time to come with us to Noah's funeral. At first, I asked her not to, because I don't want her to throw her whole life around for me. But she kept insisting, and after I talked with Amanda, I dropped it. I wanted her by my side during that time, God knows I did. But I don't want her to do so much offering only for her to get nothing from me in return.

Anyways, we agreed she'd ask a personal day and come home with me. It was all settled, until the day before the funeral. She called me, telling me she couldn't come. No explanation, no reason. She just couldn't come anymore. She left me to go with her family and used that to back her up. I wouldn't be entirely alone.

So, here we are. We're standing in front of the England team, fighting. Well, not exactly fighting, but I'm sure everyone back inside was wondering why we greeted each other so awkwardly. We didn't even hug.

"Look, I'm going to head inside now. I need to settle in", I said while I closed my eyes and sighed out. I really, really didn't want to deal with this on my first day.

"Wait", she said. She grabbed my wrist, but not too tight so it wouldn't hurt me.

"Please, let me go Leah", I said while I tried to get her hand off me.

"Right, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to grab you like that. Just let me ask you something", she begged. I could never resist those eyes so I just nodded slightly while I kept staying where I was.

"Uhm, how are you? With Noah and all?", she asked.

"I'm fine. Let's go", I answered a bit shorter. I didn't want to talk about Noah this camp, and I already told her that on the phone earlier today. I don't understand why she brings him back up.

"Look, I'm sorry. I really wanted to be there", she shouted after me. I, again, stopped in my tracks and even dropped my bags now.

"But you weren't. You didn't even explain why you couldn't be there! Look, at first I didn't want you to come, you know that. You can't change your whole life, always dropping your own things and taking mine on. But first you promise me you'd be there. You promised me. But yeah, the funeral was nice if you wanted to know that", I snapped.