Getting Through Life

Chapter 26: Any time

Trigger warning!

And here we were again. After the night, Leah and I just went to my house again. Felix, Jacob and Leah's parents came too. Nobody wanted to go to sleep again in their house, so we set up every bed and couch we had.

I was lying next to Leah but I couldn't sleep. I was just rustling around all the time.

I wanted to call Al- mom. But right now, it was half past five, so that meant her night already begun. I woke her and Tobin up one too many times already. Lisa was also not an option, because she also had a match tomorr-, well today. So, I guess I should just lay here. I think Leah's asleep, her breathing is even. 

"Louise?", someone whispered through our door. I couldn't answer because that would wake Leah up, but I got out of bed and silently opened the door. And who was behind it?

Felix. Of course it was him.

"Can't sleep either?", I more stated than asked.

"Nope, I assume you don't either", he boomeranged my sentence.

"You got that right", I sighed while I leaned against the doorpost.

"You want to go downstairs?", he asked me.

"I would, but are Amanda and David not laying there?", I asked. We couldn't speak out loud if they were.

"Maybe we can go outside in the grass? The weather's nice for a cold winter day", he made a point. If we wore enough clothes, I don't think the cold should bother us. 

"You know what, screw it. Let's do it. Go get ready, I'll meet you downstairs", I instructed him.

I threw on the first warm clothes I could find. In this case, being some sweatpants, three T-shirts on top of each other, and a warm hoodie that I stole from Leah one day. And then my jacket. Also two pair of socks. Yeah, I don't think I will be cold.

I went downstairs and Felix was already there. He made it easy for himself. He still wore his pajamas from yesterday, but he grabbed every blanket he could find. I think he was holding four or five, anyways, also enough to keep him warm.

I opened the backdoor and we got outside. We used one of the blankets to sit on. We sat closely together, because you never know when you're not going to see each other again. 

"What would he be doing now", Felix wondered.

"I think he's pestering mom and dad", I said. It made me smile to think about him like that. Not the boy who is dead, but the boy who always annoyed everyone. I also still call them 'mom' and 'dad' because for Felix, they were. For the three of us, they were. Nobody will ever change that fact, they were there in our youth. They didn't really act like it, but they were the figures you looked at when you were lost in life. I always say I understand why they were nicer to my brothers. I do, in 'mom's' case, but my dad was my biological father. I'll never understand him.

"He is for sure doing that. And stealing all the chocolate from the heaven-store"

Wow, he really had his mind already sat on that one, didn't he?

"Why can I picture him doing exactly that?", I laughed. 

"Are you going to play today?", he asked to change the subject.

"What do you want me to do?", I asked him in return. I would never leave him alone if he didn't want that.

"I want you to, but I don't want to push you. I want you to play for him, to show him we got this. We can live for ourselves and him", he said determined.