Recently, I lost a lot of people in my life.
Who mattered a lot to me?
From my friends to my family
No, they aren't dead.
I lost their presence in my life.
The importance of love and bonding has shifted.
Now it feels more like communication with no connections.
I speak, and they can't hear.
Because all the things I want to share are hidden in my mind like gems.
It's like I am about to blurt out
The things I am feeling so strongly within
About problems and worries
Then, as I am about to say it,
I stop myself, like, don't do this to yourself.
They will change, and that will break you.
A part of you will reside here.
Where it didn't matter
They made their choice long ago.
Now all these people are doing is
Investing time and having a good time
There's no need to bond.
Let's be in their flow and energy.
As much as possible
Later, leave if you can't reciprocate energy.
Which you definitely can't
I wish I could call up now.
And share these intense emotions.
But it's alright.
We all have our traumas to deal with.
Even when I see my friend right next to me,
Up so close, I don't see him or her.
I feel like I lost him or her in this herd of people.
I don't connect with
Why did I put so much on that person?
What did she or he do so wrong to deserve this?
Or why am I so unfair to her or him?
I overestimated, and now I am underestimating.
By hoping for nothing at all.
If she or he stops, I do too.
Isn't it so simple?
I miss our little things.
That didn't matter at all to him or her.
I wish I could just show my visions to her or him.
The good thing is that I got back to myself.
I am my own space.
I am my own love.
I am owned by myself and nobody else.
I see you now, and I understand you.
The focus is on me, but the time is on you when we meet, and I like that because I hardly know anything about you.
Let's get to know you.
You leave. You leave.
You stay, you stay.
You care. You care.
You don't give a damn.
I am going to live with that.
I miss you, my friend, and I am glad to have you in my life.
I mean, I lost all hope.
So go do as you please.
I'll stick around as long as I can.
I miss you, my loving, cute friend.
