1 Feb night
Today was a bit harsh, but manageable.
I meditated in the morning before starting work and felt worthless for a while in the afternoon due to some tasks I couldn't figure out.
Then I gave myself a reality check, realizing that every day can't be the same, and that's okay. I have recently started living in reality more and more. Tomorrow I got to do something, so it won't be that hectic to work tomorrow since a motivator is added, no matter if it's a work or fun thing, as long as it has people, a place, or the moment I can live. I look forward to it. Yes, wanting a positive experience is a negative experience, but the idea of a positive experience makes you content and better able to do other things. I look forward to doing things tomorrow. I worked after my walk in order to complete my assigned task. I can't wait to see this client complete their work and buzz off. Such moments make me doubt my existence in this company altogether. Then I leave it to God, because he has better plans for me. I love you, god ❤️. I went to the gym, had a fun workout, and finally started to work towards my goals. I lost 2 kg more now, with just 10–13 kg to go, so in February I am aiming for 5 kg. Fingers crossed. I really hope I do it.
