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JACKIE

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JACKIE

After everyone cleared out and I took the time to clean up, Devin took Raymond for a ride Ant and Raymond's friends rode with him. Katt, Fran and Jada took the kids to the beach and I thought I was home alone. I was cleaning up in the kitchen after Raymond almost attack Shannon and Devin took him out I told Shannon and her kids it was time to go. I held it for as long as I could.

*SMASH, SMASH, SMASH, SMASH*

I started breaking dishes and finally I stopped and stood in the kitchen just cried in my hands. I felt so bad and my feelings was hurting to hear Raymond talk about me like that, Shannon knew what she was doing she was so wrong for that.

"Jackie, Jackie" someone said I turned and saw Jada standing there with a worried look on her face. "Jackie?"

"It's okay a few dishes fell" I said whipping my face kneeling down to pick of the broken plates, Jada knelt down to helping me. We cleaned up the kitchen together neither one of us saying a word till we were done. We then went into the livingroom and sat on the couch.

"What's going on? Why was you crying and breaking dishes.?" Jada asked, I was looking at my hands...

"Um, judging on the way you've been acting and looking at me, I assume you know that I'm Raymond's mother, right?"

"Yes, I know."

"Do I really look like him?" I asked

"Yes, you do," She said.

"I want you to know I didn't give him up, I didn't give him away I loved him and I still do but he's so angry and he has so much hatred in his heart for me" I said

"Talk to him tell him" she said I shook my head no.

"When I went into labor my Mother was there for me. When I went through labor I had problems, so much so that my doctor had to ask me if I would want to live or my baby. I told him my baby. When my Mother asked me I told her the same thing. My child would survive even if I did not. It was a long, and complicated labor, and delivery. At the end I remember the doctor and nurses coaching me on, trying to keep me going. I remember seeing myself on the delivery table, so many doctors and nurses around, so many people cheering me on. I knew I was dying, I also knew I didn't want to go, I wanted to be there for my son. Then he was born my Raymond looking like a Rooster. I remember cheers I remember asking if he was okay I remember them taking him out of the room, never allowing me to even hold him long." I said

"That's so messed up" she said

"When I gave birth, to my knowledge he would come back with me to my parent's home. They told me he and I would be welcomed my other 2 kids was there until I was able to go home I was wrong. 24 hours after I gave birth he was taken away. Here I was in the hospital, hearing babies crying, wanting to see my child only to be told he was gone. His father took him from me, and the hospital didn't even tell me or question any of it. I could not believe what I was hearing." I said

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