Requested?: No
Prompt: "BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!"
Type of oneshot: Songfic/Fluff
Song Used: Dernieré Danse - Indila
Timing: Modern AU
Reader's Relations: None
Warnings: Mentions of Depression and self-harm, don't read if this is a trigger!!!
Other notes: Reader is an ice skater - https://genius.com/Genius-english-translations-indila-derniere-danse-english-translation-lyrics - English lyrics for the song
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I skated out onto the ice, completely forgetting that my friends had come to watch the final of the competition, if I had I would have used my back-up song for my free skate rather than the one I'd originally planned.
I took a deep breath as the music started playing, starting my routine.
Ô ma douce souffrance
Pourquoi s'acharner? Tu r'commences
Je n'suis qu'un être sans importance
Sans lui, je suis un peu paro
Je déambule seule dans l'métro
Une dernière danse
Pour oublier ma peine immense
Je veux m'enfuir que tout r'commence
Ô ma douce souffrance
I scolded myself as I flubbed up one of my quads turning it into a triple axel instead, but put it to the back of my mind.
J'remue le ciel, le jour, la nuit
Je danse avec le vent, la pluie
Un peu d'amour, un brin de miel
Et je danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse
Et dans le bruit, je cours et j'ai peur
Est-ce mon tour ? Revient la douleur
Dans tout Paris, je m'abandonne
Et je m'envole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole
It was at this moment that I remembered my friends were there and my mind drifted to Laf. As my thoughts took over my body, I realised he'd be able to understand every single word of the song and my heart rate increased, knowing that once I'd been freed from my coach, he'd try and find me and ask me what the words were about.
Que d'espérance
Sur ce chemin en ton absence
J'ai beau trimer, sans toi ma vie n'est qu'un décor qui brille, vide de sens
J'remue le ciel, le jour, la nuit
Je danse avec le vent, la pluie
Un peu d'amour, un brin de miel
Et je danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse, danse
Et dans le bruit, je cours et j'ai peur
Est-ce mon tour ? Revient la douleur
Dans tout Paris, je m'abandonne
Et je m'envole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole, vole
I continued my routine, trying not to let my emotions take over me. Throughout my life, I'd been bullied, and eventually left school due to my depression getting the better of me and almost killing myself, however, Laf had managed to get me to the hospital in time, but I made him promise not to tell the other boys, which thankfully he agreed to. I'd decided myself, that I didn't have anything to live for, and once I had finished this World Championship, I was going to end my life. Nothing had gone well for me in life, so there was no point in me being alive, and even though I had a crush on Laf, the one person who had been there for me throughout my whole life, I knew he liked Peggy, so there was no point in my staying live to view the inevitable of them getting married...
