Chapter 33

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Oh, no. Not again...

The sky was a mix of navy, blue, and pink above me from where I stood outside, trying to catch my breath and cringing as I tried to recover from the large, violent vomit that I had just taken.

Luckily, I could only slightly see the beautiful creation that I had just excreted from my jaws, as the sun was only just beginning to rise. Thank goodness.

I mean, for the past few quarter moons, I had gotten up fairly early, slowly and quietly sneaking out of Wendell's cat bed to go down to the basement. To be honest, I had been spending most of my time down there taking inventory, and eventually, dragging different objects towards my favorite window to stack them. It had been a process, and I'd unfortunately only been able to stack up items just a little past my own height.

And surely I would have made more progress by now, but lately with each day that had gone by, the task had felt much more grueling and exhausting. I'd had to take more breaks, even call it a day early...

And, for the past few days, had to bolt out of the basement and outside to throw up.

Sure, I suppose I could have just let it rip in the basement or inside of the house, but I didn't want the Twolegs to make a big deal out of it, or take me to the vet thinking I was sick.

And as far as the average Twoleg could assume – I was sick. However, I was almost certain that I was not. At least, not in the usual way, or the way that necessarily meant anything bad.

This was my second go-around, after all. I knew how this went. Oh, dear...

It was something about this morning's sickness in particular that made it finally hit, and made me feel pretty certain about it.

And now feeling a bit better with everything out of my system, I found myself padding up to some rocks that the Twolegs seemed to have set up themselves as scenery in the backyard. I hoped and prayed to StarClan that I still had the ability to jump, and then thankfully successfully leapt up to the top of the rock.

I then sat down, then wrapped my tail around my paws to keep it from shaking. Goodness gracious, do I wish that Chrissy and Sparrow had given me the talk... I thought to myself, letting out a sigh. But the deed is done.

The deed was done, and this surely meant that I would have to stay here in the Twolegplace for at least a while longer – that was the plan anyway, but now, I have no choice...

I then looked down at my stomach, my heart beginning to race as I was suddenly filled with so much fear and so much love at the same time. But luckily I care about myself and you all enough to not try to push myself to my limit... I then said silently. My escape plan will just have to be on hold. I have to rest, and then...

I then closed my eyes for a moment, letting out another sigh and shaking my head. And then I will be a mother again.

I tightened my tail's grip around my paws, now being certain that if I were to let it whip back and forth, it would likely kill any bug that flew in its path. Great StarClan, what does this mean for my future? Returning to the Clans?

I then forced myself to take a deep breath. One day at a time, Mistpelt. One day at a time. But at the same time...

I then let out a shaky sigh, opening my eyes and glancing up at the dawn sky – for comfort, I suppose. Wrenkit is still out there... I then thought, my heart seeming to fall and sink through the rocks below me. Oh, my love, I am so sorry. I wish more than anything that I could be there for you and be with you... I was so close to getting to.

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