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20

Addison helped Meredith to get changed, her legs were spasming a lot and she was tired. Meanwhile Derek and Ellis were getting a quick snack

"Derek told me he likes me." Meredith suddenly said

"He told me before as well. Are you okay? Do you want him out of the house?" Addison asked, helping with Meredith's socks

"He shouldn't like me at all, Addison. I'm.. you know." She sighed

"You're perfect, Meredith. Do you like Derek?" Addison tied Meredith's shoes

"He's handsome and funny and I love how he treats Ellis.. But I don't know if I can do this, Addison. I can't forget Finn."

"No one's saying you have to forget him. But he'd want you to be happy, to live your life.. And if that'd be with Derek then I'm sure Finn would support that." Addison explained as she finished helping Meredith with her clothes. "Derek was really worried about you when you got sick."

"Addie.. Everything is so confusing, it hurts my head." Meredith muttered

"Just get to know him, no one is expecting you to get together right away." Addison said and Meredith agreed

The two of them made their way out and met with Ellis and Derek

Meredith hurried to Derek's side, feeling guilty about her reaction earlier

"I think it'd be nice if we talked later?" Meredith suggested. "Are you home tonight?"

"I am, yes." Derek nodded, not sure if Meredith was ready for this and he didn't want her to feel pressured

"Once Ellie's asleep I think we should talk.." Meredith muttered as they reached the car.

Meredith got Ellis buckled in and got in the car, Addison stored her wheelchair in the back and they drove off back to the house where Meredith and Ellis decided to go take a nap on the bed

...

Hours later, Meredith tucked Ellis in in her new bed. "Night night, princess. Sweet dreams." Meredith whispered, kissing Ellis' head and wheeling outside, smiling happily as Ellis was snoring away

"Is she asleep?" Derek asked, a bit anxious as they'd have their chat

"Yeah.." Meredith nodded, clearly she was also nervous

"Do you want something to drink before we talk?" Derek offered

"Would you mind bringing me a diet coke?" Meredith asked, wheeling up to the couch and transfering

"Right up." Derek said and returned with drinks for both of them, sitting next to her on the couch

"I'm sorry about earlier, I panicked and I had no right to throw that at you."

"Meredith, you didn't do anything wrong. I can't even try to imagine the pain and loss you're going through." Derek honestly said, watching how she fixed herself on the couch to be more comfortable

"I don't know if I like you.. but I think? And- And you're so sweet, and I enjoy being around you, I really do.." Meredith muttered. "But I feel guilty towards Finn, but then Addie said he'd want me to be happy.. but that feels so wrong.."

"Hey, I don't wanna pressure you, Meredith. If you say no then that's all. We can still be friends I hope but I won't ever mention it again." He said softly

"I do wanna get to know you better." Meredith suddenly said. "But.. slow and not rushed."

"Just getting to know each other, Meredith. We don't need to rush anything." Derek agreed softly, rubbing her arm

"I- I just-" Meredith started muttering. "You need to know that Ellis will always be my number one priority."

"I know that, Meredith. I promise I'll never hurt her, I understand she's your number one and always will be."

"Thank you." She muttered, some tears slipping down her cheeks

"Can I hug you?" Derek asked and Meredith nodded in response so he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to his chest

"I don't wanna hurt you." Meredith whispered

"Why would you hurt me?" Derek frowned, wiping her tears

"Derek.. Look at me." Meredith muttered, looking at her lower body, only now she realized Derek was calming one of her spasms

"I am looking at you and you're gorgeous." He assured her

"And paralyzed!" Meredith groaned

"And you're paralyzed, so what? I'm a neurosurgeon, I know what paralysis does and I like you, whatever?"

Meredith remained quiet, she was exhausted but it felt great to be in Derek's arms. His arms were larger and stronger than the arms she was used to and Derek smelled amazing, she wasn't sure if anyone could have more perfect hair

"Close your eyes and take a nap if you want." Derek said, still keeping her upright

Meredith nodded. She was tired and wanted to go to bed but she also wanted to spend time with Derek, she was so curious to get to know him

"Just rest, I know you're tired. I can carry you to bed if you'd want?" He suggested

"No.. fine here." She muttered and drifted off

Addison walked down the stairs, she damn well knew what was happening

"Is she okay?" The redhead asked

"She is now, I hope." Derek's fingers playing with her hair

"Don't you dare hurt her, that's all I wanna say." Addison warned him

Flashback

"I can't- I-" Meredith groaned as she was working with Charlotte, her physical therapist, at home on her transfering skills

"I know you can, you're doing amazing." Charlotte cheered her on

"It hurts-" Meredith winced and dropped herself

"Okay, tell me where it hurts, please." Charlotte asked

"My arms hurt so much." Meredith groaned

"But no pain in your back?" Charlotte asked and rubbed out Meredith's arms

"Nothing unusual, it always hurts." Meredith shrugged

"Okay, then let's try once more, please." Charlotte said and Meredith actually made it this time, she was panting for air but it worked, she has never been so proud of herself and she actually started to believe she might be able to do this. She needed to get as strong as she could, for Ellis. Because her daughter would need her.