Thoughts I Had Today

Never Had A Chance

I saw you today for the first time, since last year.
A year filled with nothing but Radio Silence from you.

In that moment, I tried my best to keep myself from shaking out of fear.
The fear of how you would react upon seeing me... and what you'll say first.
But nothing happened.

Except the ever so growing distance between us. You were so close, yet so heartbreakingly far. It was the first time in our 10 years of life together, that you treated me that way.
It was like I was looking at a different person - I didn't recognise you.
The you before me in that moment, scared me.

It hurt. It hurt so much; that even word's can't describe the pain I felt.
It was so painful that I felt like crying my eyes out.
But i didn't. I held back.

I missed you... so very much.

Seeing your face after so long, had my heart running 100km an hour. It was beating so loud, that it felt like everyone in the room could hear it.
The mixed emotions I felt was so overwhelming that it had me blushing for the wrong reasons.

I miss you.
I miss you.
I miss you.
I missed you.