Destiel one shots

Where We Still Exist(7)

The next morning, everything felt... wrong, they moved like they used to—like before, almost robotically too.

Dean in his usual layers, Cas back in his suit, every movement quiet, practiced... distant, like the past year had never happened.

Dean noticed it when Cas struggled with his tie, that never used to happen—well, Cas had never had to remove his tie in the first place before, this year with him never needing to wear a tie.

He stepped in without a word, standing close, fingers working the fabric into place, Cas didn't move—just watched him.

Dean could feel it. That gaze. Soft. Familiar. Too familiar. Only for him, his hands started to shake at that thought.

The knot slipped wrong, he tried again—but his vision blurred, breath catching, and suddenly he couldn't—

"Dean...", and that was it he broke, leaning forward, he pressed into Cas's chest, shoulders trembling as the tears came.

"Why can't we have this?", he choked, "Why can't this just... be our life?", he asked, too many emotions in his voice.

Cas stilled for half a second—like something inside him cracked—before his arms wrapped around Dean, firm and grounding.

He pulled back just enough to see him, hands gentle as they wiped at his cheeks, "Dee...", he murmured, pressing a kiss to his forehead, lingering there.

Dean's eyes slipped shut, "I made you a promise", Cas said softly, "Not just yesterday. From the very beginning, since the first night I stayed with you," he said.

His thumb brushed under Dean's eye, catching another tear, "I will find you. I will come when you call. No matter where you are... no matter what happens," he said, no he promised.

A breath, "You don't lose me, Dean, you are never going to lose me", he said and Dean nodded, even if it didn't feel true.

"Whatever happens... this? Us? It's not going anywhere", Cas promised again and Dean gave a small, fragile smile and leaned in, kissing him softly.

"I'm sorry", he whispered when they pulled back, "If I cursed us...", he stopped unable to say anything more.

Cas stilled, "Dean Winchester", he said, almost gently—but firm enough to stop him, "You didn't", he said and paused.

Then, in a softer tone—, "I love you", he said and Dean froze, Cas held his gaze, steady, unwavering.

"I won't keep saying it if it scares you", he added quietly, "I can keep saying it in Enochian, or not at all... but it doesn't change anything", he said firmly.

His hand tightened slightly around Dean's, "I will always come back to you", he promised looking deeply into Dean's eyes.

Dean didn't speak—just nodded, eyes still wide, like he was trying to hold onto the moment before it disappeared.

"Are you hungry?", the angel asked after a minute and Dean shook his head letting a breath out, "What about our home?", he asked instead and Cas's face broke into a smile.

This was both of their first real home, so he waved his hand, "I have trapped our home in a pocket dimension, time won't run outside as long as we are inside", he explained.

"Like Narnia?", Dean asked and Cas tilted his head making Dean laugh and peck his lips, "God, I've made you watch so many movies, but missed Narnia", he said.

"Wait, does that mean anyone can come in?", he asked and Cas shook his head, "Only ones with my grace can both see it and enter the house", Cas said, lifting Dean's hand with the ring and kissing it and Dean smiled.