"Sir, Colin, Mr. Alonzo on line two."
"Okay, thanks," he said to the secretary before pressing the button.
"Yes?"
"What's this?!"
"What?"
"Don't fuckin' get innocent with me!"
"Why don't you tell that to yourself?" he calmly replied.
Beep!
After five minutes.
"Colin, excuse me again, Mr. Alonzo on line one."
"Okay."
He pressed the button, "Yes?"
"Why?"
"Why what?"
"Edward, I'm losing my patience here."
"Who cares?"
"I'm asking you why are you resigning?!"
"You know why."
"You're really willing to lose our twenty years of friendship for that woman?!"
"Do you really want me to answer that?"
"Damn you, yes!"
"I told you from the beginning, I will do that if you ever, ever gonna hurt her. You thought I was not serious? Well, I am. And you only did not hurt her, you bastard, you killed your child! Your own child, do you hear me?!"
"I....I what?"
"Nothing. Just go on hating the world!"
He dropped the line.
Another ring from his secretary.
"Sir, ehhr, Colin, Mr. Alonzo..."
"Tell him to go to hell!"
"Sir?"
"Just say I left his company."
"As you wish, sir."
"Thank you."
He became busy packing his things when later he heard his voice outside his office.
"You're fired," dinig niyang sigaw nito sa sekretarya niya.
Three, two, one....
"Anong sinasabi mong pinatay ko ang bata? Answer me, damn you!" bulalas agad nito nang makapasok sa opisina niya.
He didn't mind his shouting, bagkus pinuntahan niya ang sekretarya niya. Naabutan niya itong nanginginig sa takot habang inaayos ang mga papeles sa mesa nito.
"I'm sorry about our rude boss. But don't mind him. He's just messed up."
"Eh, sir, baka po hindi lang sigaw ang abutin ko sa kanya," umiiyak nitong sumbong sa kanya.
"Wag kang mag-alala, akong bahala. Just stay here, okay? Pasok sa isang tenga, labas sa kabila. Yun ang gagawin mo kapag sinigawan ka niya. I'm your boss, not him. At least not yet."
He tapped her shoulders saka bumalik sa opisina niya. Again, hindi na naman niya pinansin ito habang pabalik-balik ito ng lakad na parang hindi mapakali. Binalikan na lang niya ang mga gamit niyang inilalagay sa mga boxes.
"I'm not gonna repeat what I asked. Will you stop that?! Ano bang problema mo?!"
Hindi niya pinansin ito.
"Edward, will you answer me?! Anong problema? Anong pinatay ang pinagsasabi mo?"
"Why do you care? It's not your child anyhow," sagot niya habang patuloy pa rin siya sa paglalagay sa box.
"Fuck this!" hablot nito sa box sabay tapon sa sahig. "Ano ang sinasabi mo?!" sigaw nito sa kanya sabay hablot sa may kuwelyo niya.
"Let go, asshole!"
"I won't until you tell me what's going on!"
"Why not go there and ask her yourself?"
Matagal silang nagtitigan. Si Adam ang unang sumuko, binitawan siya nito at nanlulumong napaupo sa sahig, subsob ang ulo sa brasong nakapatong sa tuhod.
"I can't. I can't go to her. Not yet," sagot nito sa mahinang boses.
Ginaya niya ang ginawa nito. Umupo din siya sa sahig sabay sandal sa may mesa.
"It's too late anyhow. Huli na ang lahat. She lost the baby, Adam, and I can very well damn say it's all your fault."
Hinaklit na naman nito ang kuwelyo ng polo niya.
"No! It's not possible! Damn it, Edward, tell me it's not true!"
"Let go of my shirt, Adam."
His friend did let him go.
"Tell me it's not true," halos bulong na pakiusap nito sa kanya.
"I'm sorry. You lost your chance to be a father. But I'm not sorry you lost your chance on Samantha. You don't deserve her. Not at all. And I'm guilty as you for letting you get near her. I should have known. I should have known you would do this to her."
"I'm sorry."
"Hindi sa akin mo dapat sabihin yan."
Wala silang naging imikan pagkatapos.
"How? I mean, why? When?"
"I am going to ask you the same. How could you do that to her? Why did you treat her that way? And when will you realize it's all on you? Answer me those questions and I might answer yours."
"She's the only person I trusted my heart into, Edward, yet she lied to me! And it's not an ordinary lying, Edward, she lied about Manzano, she lied about that woman!"
"Because she's afraid! She's afraid to lose you! She's afraid that you would not understand her and would hate her the way you did to to your mother. At eto na ang kinatatakutan niya. Nangyari na, nadamay pa ang pagbubuntis niya. She lost the baby dahil sa yo, Adam, dahil sa 'yo. Ano pang sakit ang puwede mong iparamdam sa kanya nang dahil dyan sa kakitiran ng utak mo?!"
"Christ!"
"Kailangan pa bang may mangyaring ganoon bago mo ma-realize sa sarili mo na walang patutunguhan ang magkimkim ng galit? Akala ko ba willing kang sumugal? Akala ko ba willing kang ipaubaya ang puso mo sa kanya, Adam, pero bakit?"
"Hi..hindi ko alam. I thought I'm ready, I thought kaya ko."
"It's been twenty years nang iniwan ka nang nanay mo Adam and from that time on, you swore na hindi na siya parte ng buhay mo. You always said wala ka nang pakialam sa kanya. Pero ang hindi mo na-realize, she's till running your life. You're still allowing her to run your life! In fact, she keeps ruining your life! Hindi mo ba naiinitindihan yon? Why can't you just forget about her and move on?!"
"I did!"
"No, you didn't! You thought you did but you didn't! You still fuckin' didn't! You're still that fuckin' seven year old boy who begged his mother to stay and love him! She's not gonna fuckin' love you back Adam! She won't! Ever! Why not finally accept it and move on? Why do you still insist yourself on someone who won't love you even if she has an obligation to love you and throw away the love someone is willingly and wholeheartedly wanted to give it to you?!"
"Because I'm an asshole, that's why."
"Exactly! Look at you now! Look at you and Samantha! She's the one who's offering to love you, with your imperfection and all! So what if she's Manzano's relative? So what if he asked her to spy on....?" he stopped.
"She what?! He asked her to spy on who?" bumalik na naman ang bagsik sa mukha nito sabay hila sa kuwelyo niya.
"On you, okay? On you. For the nth time, will you get your hands off my shirt? Sisirain mo ba damit ko?"
Binitawan naman siya nito. "Explain."
"Do you remember that day when we first met her?"
"Oo."
"That day, she applied for a job at AlCom at the instruction of Manzano. At first, she agreed with him to do it, but being a good soul, she decided against it in the end. She was still contemplating on how she will explain to the old guy why she failed the application tests when we almost hit her."
Napangiti ang kausap niya.
"Bakit?"
"Kaya pala."
"Imagine the horror in the face of our HR Manager. I talked to her about Sam's application and she said Samantha was one crazy applicant! She didn't pass any single test and she even had the nerve to put those positions she wanted to apply to!"
"I read her profile. Kung tinanggap pala siya, wala na ako sa posisyon ko ngayon," natatawang iling ni Adam.
"Me, too! But the manager was wise enough not to accept her, Otherwise, even her job would be at risk!"
"President, VP-Finance and HR Manager? What was she thinking?!"
At tuluyan na silang humagalkpak ng tawa. Napuno ang kuwarto ni Colin ng ingay ng tawa nilang dalawa, causing the secretary to come in and worriedly look at them.
"Ahm, sir, okay lang po kayo?"
"We're fine Jean! We're just having our moment!" At humagalpak na naman siya ng tawa.
"S..sige po, maiwan ko na kayo," nag-aalangang paalam ng sekretarya niya.
"President? She wanted to be the president? I have to give the HR manager a bonus for not accepting Samantha! Ha ha ha!"
"Your fiance's really one hell of a crazy lady! Ha ha ha!"
Adam stopped laughing. "Ex! She's my ex-fiance! I ruined it all, brod. I ruined everything. And I lost her. I lost the baby. I lost the family I ever wanted with my whole life!"
"I'm sorry. I hate to say this, but I told you so. Either you try your damn best getting her back or do your damn best failing to find someone like her."
Tuluyan na itong nahiga sa sahig at ipinatong ang braso sa noo.
"I feel like I'm seven years old again, brod. And I don't know what to do."
Humiga na din siya sa sahig at ginaya ang posisyon ni Adam.
"You know what do, my friend. And this time, you have to do it all by yourself. I just hope her love for you is big enough to forgive your mistake and start all over again."
Tiningnan niya ang kaibigan. Nakatingin lang ito sa kisame.
"How did it happen?"
"Ang alin?"
"The miscarriage."
"I visited her the next day I told you about her pregnancy. She was expecting you'd be there, happy to see that she got pregnant. One tiny moment, I saw her hope, her eagerness to see you outside her bedroom door. Then she asked me if you said anything. I swear I tried to lie but she knew me well until I was forced to tell her your reaction."
"Edward, how could you?!"
"I couldn't lie Adam, I swear I tried to! But she was too hurt, and telling her a lie would be too much! She was inside the bathroom when she shouted. She was bleeding too much. We brought her to the hospital, but it was too late. According to the doctor, the stress and too much crying and not eating at all we're only few of the reasons kung bakit mahina kapit ng bata. I wanted to kill you right there and then, Adam, I was already killing you in my mind. How could you man?! How could you do this to her!"
"I killed my baby!" dinig niyang garalgal na boses nito. Lumingon siya dito and he saw his friend's shoulders were shaking. Adam was crying.
"I'm sorry, man, but it's all your fault. And I'm sorrier to say you're no longer welcome in their family. "
"What do you mean?"
"Her father told me to keep you away from her. "
"I'm sorry, Sam! I don't know what to say!"
He didn't get a reaction from her. She just kept staring at the ceiling.
"How are you feeling? Are you okay?"
"I'm okay. I want to rest, if you don't mind."
"Okay, pahinga ka na. Andito lang ako. Andito lang kami."
"Okay." At tinalikuran na siya nito sabay pikit ng mga mata.
He looked at her father who was also staring at his daughter.
"Iwan muna natin siya, hijo."
Tumango siya saka umalis sa tabi ni Samantha.
He will kill Adam. He's sure of that!
"Tito, pwede ko po ba kayong makausap?"
"Tara sa labas."
Nang makarating sa labas.
"I'm sorry for what happened to Samantha."
"Ako rin. Ako rin, Colin. At hinding-hindi ko mapapatawad ang kaibigan mo sa nangyari sa anak at sa apo ko!"
"I....I don't....I'm really sorry."
"Huwag na huwag niyang ipapakita ni anino niya sa akin at baka hindi ko matantiya ang sarili ko at baka mapatay ko siya!"
"Tito, if there's anything I can do..."
"Keep him away from my daughter, that's the best that you can do for her."
"That won't happen!"
"She was sleeping when I left the hospital. She was devastated, Adam. She was not talking, but she was not crying either. But I know she's dying inside. For now, wala kang gagawin, wag kang lalapit sa kanya. Everybody hates you there, and frankly, I hate you too. This is all your doing!"
"I know! God damn it, I know!"
