the experimental animatronics!
*everyone is sitting on a chair*
Which animatronic can do the most inefficient threat to someone who harms the reader?
Freddy: "Carl the cupcake."
Bonnie: "Pinkie pie."
Foxy: "My hook."
Chica: "t h e i n n o c e n t s i d e o f
m e . "
PROVE THYSELVES!!!
Kid: YOURE A LAME FREEK WID NU FRENDS N U DON BELON G HEER O M G JU ST DOI ALREDDY
REACTIONS!!
Freddy: WHERE ARE THE KNIVES. DO I HAVE THE PETITION TO KILL THIS HUMAN?
Bonnie: I WILL SHOVE YOU INTO THE DEEP DARK PITS OF HELL. THEY BELONG WHERE THEY WANT TO BELONG, AND YOU'RE JUST A NOBODY TRYING TO ACT COOL.
Foxy: Your existence disgusts me. WANNA KNOW WHAT'S LAME?! GETTING STABBED IN THE NECK BY THE PERSON YOU CALLED LAME!!
Chica: I will surgically attach your face into your butt and destroy all your limbs and let you keep walking on this earth as an eldritch monstrosity with his face smelling his own butt if you even dare say they have no friends.
we ARE their friends.
Bonus
Goldie: YOU WANNA GO? HUH? HUH? HUH? YOU STUPID MONKEY FACED DIMWITTED DUM DUM WITH THE WORST THREATS EVER? YOU WANT THEM TO DIE, HUH? I WILL MUTILATE YOUR FACE AND DESTROY EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY, I WILL BURN YOU ALIVE AND TURN YOUR ASHES INTO CAT LITTER SO ALL THE WONDERFUL CATS IN THE WORLD CAN TAKE A POO IN YOUR FACE. THEY WILL DISPOSE OF YOU TO THE GARBAGE DUMP, WHERE YOU BELONG, BECAUSE NOBODY TRULY LOVES YOU. EVERYONE HATES YOU AND YOUR EXISTENCE. WHO ALLOWED YOU TO LIVE, ANYWAY?
Okay I'm done.
Here be the winners!
1st place: NO ONE!!!
2nd place: Carl the cupcake!!
3nd place: PINKIE PIE!!!
NO ONE WON!!!
Because you guys get scary when it comes to protecting the reader.
Freddy: Can we kill the guy now
Foxy: We're pretty mad.
Bonnie: *eats the angretti spaghetti*
Chica: *takes out her gattling gun*
Goldie: *activates his hellfire powers*
Yes you may.
-1 frame later, followed by an entire theme of megalovania that played so fast, that it lasted only one frame.
*there's nothing but a small drop of blood in the place of where the guy was standing.
*everyone was bloody, shots have been fired, and dunks have been dunked on.
*THE ANGRETTI SPAGHETTI INTENSIFIES*
