KP/C&B Jokes #12

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This shit's back again, yo.

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Jeff: My girlfriend is on a mission so while she's away, I'm gonna cut the sleeves off of all of my shirts.

Ao: why??

Jeff: She's pretty much 85% of my impulse control.

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DATING TIP: Hold the door for your date. Rip off the door from its hinges. Use the door as a weapon to fight off other men. Establish dominance.

Jack: Okay...!

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Death: Hey, do you have any--?

Jeff: Buzz Lightyear pajamas?? *picks up pajamas* Yes I do.

Death: No, any self-respect?

Jeff: Oh! *laughs as he puts pajamas down* ...No.

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-Jack Tries to Flirt-

Jack: Ao?

Ao: Yes?

Jack: You, uh...you have a very...you...you've got a pretty...you...

Ao: Jack, are you oka--?

Jack: niCe gENEtiC COMPOSITION

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Jeff: Good credit, bad credit, no credit, no problem!! You dead?! fuCk iT, GHOST CREDIT.

Ben: Im gonna get a Subaru :D

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Jack: What did you do??

Ben: Su.. *mumbles*

Jack: What?!?

Ben: Suck dick on accident.

Jack: How the fuck do you suck dick on accident??

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Jeff: C'mon. *pulling on Ben*

Ben: *holding onto the edge of the curb* No! I'm not going!

Jeff: C'mon kid. *still pulling*

Ben: You belong in there!!!! *won't let go*

Jeff: C'mon, into the trash with you, kid...!

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Ao: There's only one thing worse than a rapist. *takes off paper to reveal the word child above rapist*

Ben: A child.

Ao: No.

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Maury: The results are in. Zalgo....

Zalgo: Yeah?

Maury: ...You are the father!

Ellie: The fuCK YOU AIN'T *gets up and smacks him across the face, overturns his chair*

Jeff: *quietly and nervously walks off the stage*

Ben: *watches in the roaring crowd and eats popcorn*

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Jeff: Ben, why'd you turn off the lights??

Ben: To save power, duh! And I wanna suck your dick.

Jeff: ...

Ben: *plays Pony*

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Jeff: *aggressively screams* sHIT!!!!

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