Just Me

WhAt shOULd I dO?

Alright, by now I'm sure most of you have associated the weird upper-case-lower-case titles with stuff about my nearly non-existent love life. Is it called a love life? Does that have more to do with sex, or is that called sex life? Whatever, this stuff is always about my crush and how utterly fucking weird I am.

So, as most of you know, summer is nearly upon us, meaning the end of another school year. I only have one month left before I leave and become a junior. Since I haven't gotten that far into talking with my crush, I wanted to figure out ways that I could. Obviously, I can't become friends with him in the span of a month considering how much I see him, which is not that much. We only have one class together, and sometimes we run into each during our lunches if I'm lucky. Sorta. Not really.

Anyway, I was thinking, if I can't become friends with him so fast, how can I? And I thought, what if we talked over the summer? Then I thought, But how would I ask him that? Can I be straightforward or would I ease into that question? Am I considered a good enough acquaintance to have him accept that kind of offer? This would be completely up to him. I'd only be asking. I don't know how to ask, or when it's a good time. I don't want to wait until the last minute to ask, because then I might lose him and despair for about three months.

When should I ask?

How should I ask?

Should I go, "Hey, I think you're a pretty neat guy so I was wondering if we could possibly talk more over the summer? Via whatever messaging platform"? That sounds, like, really smart at the end though... Fuck it.

I don't know. I don't know what to do, mang.

Beleeegh.

I'm too awkward for my own good. ;-;

I really would like to at least be friends with him. Just wanna get to know him and all that jazz. Because I think he's a nice guy and it'd be stupid of me to not know someone as special and, honestly, as rare as him. Sure he reads more books than me, and sure he's far more athletic than I ever will be, and sure he can probably solve a Rubik's cube under twenty minutes (I know his buddies can and it's fucking ridiculous) but he's fuckin' awesome and awesome people are the best people. When will I get to meet someone like this again?? Probably never.

I'm probably not making any sense.

FUUUUUUUUUGHGHGHCCCCK

He's sooooooooo coOL.

And in real life I'm probably nOT.

My friend Alexis talked about him with me and I told her that I was afraid that he'd find me weird. And she just laughed and gave me a look, then said, "Hun, he's pretty weird too, trust me." And I'm like wtf does that mean? I mean, that sounds cute, but wut?

AAAAHAHHHHHHHGGGGH

THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR MY SMOL SOUL.

HE IS HANDSOME MAN.

I AM GIRL.

WHO HAS STUFF LIKE THIS ON HER PHONE.

FFFFFFMMMMMMMM

So, anyway, what should I do to ensure that I at least get to know him as a friend? Because at this rate...

HooOwoo bOY.