Just Me

KP/C&B Jokes #19

O shit waddup

I'm back with more cringe

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-If Ben Gets Roasted-

Jeff: *at Ben* I can easily mistake you as a trash can.

Ellie: *at Ben* You talk a big game about sex, now all you need is an actual partner.

Jack: *at Ben* The scent I recognize you by is the scent of pure bullshit.

Ao: *at Ben* Every time you try to tell me a joke, I laugh early because I'm already looking at one.

Ben: Ha. Nice roasts. You'll have to do better than that though.

Sam: *writes on a piece of paper* You're a lot like Link.

Ben: *stops smiling and stays silent* *pulls out his sword*

Jeff: Uhhh, Ben? You cool--?

Ben: *slashes at the group*

Everyone: *scream in utter terror*

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-Ao & Ben Go On Vacation-

Ao: Ben! What on earth was all that?

Ben: I'm not sure what you're referring to.

Ao: You sunk an entire cruise ship, Ben!

Ben: Are you sure that was me? I-I would think I'd remember something like that.

Ao: Ben, I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!

Ben: That sounds dangerous.

Ao: You were headbutting children off the ship!

Ben: That, uh... that must've been horrifying to watch!

Ao: Then you started making out with the ice sculptures!

Ben: Well, thank God that the children weren't on board to see it.

*silence*

Ao: Uhh.. Ben why is the lifeboat all red and sticky?

Ben: Well I guess you could say it is red and sticky.

Ao: Beeen, what are we standing in?

Ben: Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?

Ao: No! I would not believe that!

Ben: Uhh, melted gumdrops?

Ao: No.

Ben: Boat nectar?

Ao: No.

Ben: Some of God's tears?

Ao: Tell me the truth Ben.

Ben: Fine. ...It's the lovely elderly couple from 2B.

Ao: ...BEEEEN!

Ben: Well they were, uh, they were taking all the croissant rolls.

Ao: I can't believe what I'm hearing!

Ben: I will not apologize for art.

Ao: Where are the other lifeboats?

Ben: Whoa! You won the prize, I didn't even notice that.

Ao: Where are the other lifeboats, Ben?

Ben: Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun...probably at the bottom of the ocean. I bit lots of holes in them.

Ao: BEN!