Help our souls // bws

Distance stands in our way

My mouth opened wide in a huge yawn as I got up of the couch, where I'd been laying since I finished work today. Somehow, I was exhausted. I didn't know why, nothing really happened lately, but I only wanted to sleep. I groaned at the reason that brought me out of my laziness : someone knocking hard, several times at the door house. It was Thursday, and we had a day off school tomorrow, so my plan was so fall asleep for the rest of the weekend. My feet banged on the floor, revealing my irritation. The knock became louder as I reached the door. "For God's sake, I'm coming !" I shouted at the person about to smash our door. I finally opened it and for a second, I wish I never had. "Spencer ?" She completely exploded in front of me. Tears, small screams, her legs couldn't even keep her up. I caught her at the very last moment. "Hey, what's wrong ? What's happened ?" Her state shocked me. Her cheeks were recovered by what I assumed once was her mascara, in fact, all her makeup. The blood injected in her puffed up eyes stated that she was crying either for a very long time, either very hard for a short amount of time. I wasn't sure which option was the better. She let out a big sob as she tried to talk. "Let's get inside, yes ? You can tell me all about it later, it's alright, come on." She nodded and I strengthened my grip to not let her fall. My heart ached at the sight of her. She rarely cried, or at least, I hadn't seen her cry many times. Maybe two or three times only. She was a fighter, even when she was tired, annoyed, that something was wrong, she found a way to smile and to keep her head up. I admired her for that. I guess we were not like each other on this point. Sometimes I found it too hard to stay positive and happy, sometimes I didn't even try to make things better, I just let myself being swallowed by my demons. And every time, she held out her head to me and stopped me from drowning. This time, it was my turn. I headed upstairs and opened the door of my room. I immediately shooed away my cat from my bed and sat Spencer down. "I'm going to take off your shoes, okay ?" She nodded, still sobbing and crying. Once I was done, we laid down on my bed and I took her in my arms, giving her a warm hug. I rubbed her back gently. Her whole body shook against me and she buried her face in my t-shirt, wrapping her arm around me, searching for something to hold on to.

"Clary, I," Her voice cracked. She couldn't even speak. I was very worried about what or who makes her cries her heart out like that, but I wasn't going to push her.

"It's okay, I'm here, cry for as long as you want, I'm not going anywhere until you're fine." I whispered. We laid in my bed for about ten more minutes when she stopped crying.

"I must look terrible, am I right ?" She tried to joke but I knew at the sound of her voice something broke inside her.

"Not that much..." I lied. "So, what makes you cry like that ? What happened, Spencer ?" She deeply breath and looked at me in the eyes for a second, then back down as she spoke.

"James told me that," She took a moment so her voice won't default her. "he told me that maybe we should take a break, whilst he's gone on tour." My jaw dropped as she said those words. What the hell ? This time, I didn't understand James. I really didn't. He loved Spencer, at least he seemed like he did, and she loved him, so what was the matter ? Was he just afraid to go away for one little month ? I honestly thought he loved her enough to overcome this little distance. Disappointed was an euphemism.

"I am going to kick his ass." I groaned and moved a little. She immediately held me tight.

"No, please, don't. I," She sniffed. "I don't want him to think I'm not brave enough to talk to him or anything, you know ?" I slowly nodded, but that didn't mean I wouldn't have a chat with him later. For now, Spencer needed me, but I swear, when she would be asleep, I'll beat his ass. He couldn't just leave her because he was going on tour for a month, this was so stupid. I kept on stroking Spencer's back until she fell asleep. She really loved him, and now, I was just a ball of anger waiting to scream on the fool who made her cry. That part of me was not the one I liked the most. It showed an angry, nervous, pissed off me, forgetting the shyness and telling loud and clear what I think. Of course, that didn't happen very often, but sometimes, when someone hurt my friends.