Help our souls // bws

Remorse

"Shit ! Brad, wake up !" I shook him.

"Why, I don't want to..." He mumbled.

"Come on ! We fell asleep, it's already late ! Oh my god, I'm going to get killed !" I sat back on his bed, my head spinning for a second. I was so stupid, we started to just cuddle and I knew my eyes were slowly shutting but I still stayed. It was over 8pm now and I hadn't told anyone where I was. I took my phone and saw missing calls from both my dad and my mum and a text from my mum. Nathalie called me, I'll pick you up when I come home, around 8. No smiley, no xo, nothing. She was pissed, she definitely was. That was not even like if we were on Saturday or something, no, I have school tomorrow. "Shit..." I mumbled again.

"It's not the end of the world Clary, relax..." He said, closing his eyes, trying to sleep for a little more.

"Yes, yes it is Brad ! I hadn't told anyone where I was, I fell asleep somewhere that is not my house and besides, with a guy ! What are they going to think ?" I looked at him and he sat next to me, still wrapped in his cover. I saw a little smile on his face. "Oh no..." They were going to think we made it. A guy, a girl, a room, in a bed, perfect. Perfect, she was going to tell me off AND talk me about all this safe sex thing, that I already knew. It was going to be so awkward. He giggled and lit up his bedside lamp.

"I'm just joking... Anyway, it's not that big of a deal. I'm not just a guy, am I ?" He raised an eyebrow and I shook my head. "Good. Plus, we both know your mum seems to trust me. I'm not some unknown guy you met at some random shop, or in the street, uh ?" I nodded. I needed to relax. He was right, it wasn't like he was a stranger. "Relax." He smiled at me and once again, his little dimples appeared, which made me smile. "Now..." He grabbed my hand and made us lie on his bed again. "I prefer that." He kissed my neck and I felt his hands making their way on my stomach. He started to tickle me and a smile shaped on my face. I giggled. I had always been ticklish, always.

"Stop... this..." I say between two laughs. He came on the top of me, sitting on my legs so I won't move. I wiggled again and again, trying to escape his hands but I had no way to escape. I was laughing really hard now and so was he. I loved his laugh so much, he sounded like a little boy but I loved it. "Okay, stop, I'm out of breath..." I said, still laughing. Just after, someone knocked at his bedroom door and Nathalie's head appears.

"Clary, your mum is here." She smiled at me awkwardly. I took a moment to catch my breath back and I became nervous again. I hope she was not mad at me. I looked at him and locked my gaze with his. His eyes were shining. He looked beautiful, how lucky was I ? He was my boyfriend. This was a dream, this couldn't be possible, I didn't deserve him, I knew I didn't, but I still wanted to be with him. It was probably selfish from me, but I wanted to be selfish if it meant staying with him.

"So... Are you going to stay on me ?" I smiled and blushed at the same time, realizing the position we were in.

"Maybe ?" He smirked and took my hands, lifting my upper body. He cupped my head in his hands and kissed me gently. Our foreheads touched.

"Seems like you don't have fever anymore..." I said against his lips and kissed him one last time. "Hopefully I won't be sick too... I need to go now, move, please ?" I shyly smiled. I didn't want to go but I had to and I didn't want my mum to interrupt us like... that. He pouted but got off me. I sat and laced my shoes and turned back my head to him, now sitting next to me, again. "Get some rest. See you tomorrow ?" He nodded. I stood up and took a step away from him. If he kissed me right now, I wouldn't be able to walk out of his room. I smiled at him and when I reached the doorway, I just said goodbye. I walked in the living room and found my mum hugging Nathalie. I bet it was hard for both of them. They hadn't seen each other for years. "Are you alright, both of you ?" I said quietly. They both broke the hug.