Let Me Love You... and Lose You Too [ON HOLD]

Chapter 117: Scars

Parvati let go of her suitcase and went to the closet to get a first aid kit, still void of emotion. Anshuman stood up and watched her as she approached him. She took his hand and lead him to the bed. Anshuman, in a daze, sat down.

She took a seat next to him and started to clean up his wound, before wrapping his hand in a bandage.

"Will you stay?" he asked her, as if he was hopeful.

She continued to ignore him.

After she finished bandaging his hand, she stood up to leave again, but Anshuman grabbed her arm, pulling her down on his lap and holding her against him tightly, refusing to let go.

"I'm never letting you go. If I have to keep you here by force, then I will," he told her, pressing his face into her neck. "You're going to stay here with me."

Parvati didn't know what to feel. She didn't have it in her to struggle, nor did she have the willpower to stay. She couldn't move, yet she couldn't remain still.

What was she supposed to do?

"Please say something," he told her. "Yell at me, scream at me, tell me you hate me... but say something."

Finally, her lips began to quiver, and she finally spoke.

"You want me to say something?" she asked him, her lips trembling. "You may not be able to listen to it."

Anshuman slowly removed his face from her neck and looked up at her. He reached up to caress her cheek, but she grabbed his hand and pushed it off.

She got off his lap and took off the sweater that she was wearing and threw it on the ground, exposing her bare arms which were covered with scars. Then she removed her shirt and threw it too, exposing even more scars - from her breasts, to her stomach... everywhere she had access to, she had given herself these scars.

Parvati unzipped her jeans and took them off, throwing them on the ground as well, exposing more scars on her legs.

It killed Anshuman to see the scars on her body.

"Where were you when I was giving myself these scars?" she accused, showing him the scars from her scratching herself until she bled. "They're all over my body. They won't ever go now... where were you when I was broken inside? I had mentally fallen weak, but you weren't here to make me strong."

Anshuman stood up and reached out to hold her, but she raised a hand to stop him.

"I'm not done yet," she told him coldly, and he took a step back, his heart shattering into a million tiny pieces.

"My whole life I've been here to heal you... and the one moment that I needed you... you weren't there for me," Parvati accused. "You called me names, you didn't have faith in me... and you left me... you forgot about me. You always forget about me."

Then the pain of betrayal hit her again, and tears flooded her eyes.

"These scars are not just mental and physical, but now I'm emotionally scarred. I can't love you anymore... and I can't let myself be loved by you either," she told him, tears falling down her cheeks. "I - I'm not strong enough to let you love me... I am not strong to let myself love you... but I am weak enough to let myself lose you..."

That was when she broke down completely.