Famous Collide || h.s.

Chapter 50: Sorrow and Nostalgia

Lisa P.O.V.

I struggled to read the rest of the letter, as countless tears running down my cheeks. I had beaten my hands in front of my mouth and shook my head repeatedly. She couldn't be serious. I had thought she would turn away from me and wanted to say goodbye with a recent letter. But she didn't. She didn't turn her back to me just like dad did.

She don't despised me.

She don't hate me.

She wasn't disappointed in me.

She was still my mom.

The person I can go to, when problems try to drag me down.

And I was so stupid by thinking she wouldn't be there for me. I should have known it. I mean she is my mother. After all she has this big heart and this understanding, I known for so long.

I should have known better. Why didn't I rather read the letter? Why was I now forced to be able to read it? I had so many opportunities for reading but it didn't do this small thing. I just had to open it and ...

I couldn't hold back a sob when I laid the letter aside. Now I wanted nothing more than to be able to be with her. I wanted to feel her familiar arms around me, hear her quiet voice and just feel her near. I haven't seen and spoken her in a long time that it seemed like years.

I tried to wipe away the tears, but it was impossible. More and more flowed down my cheeks and didn't stop. I didn't had the strength to restrain my grief. Why was it so hard lately? Why do I had to go through all of this? Couldn't my life be as normal as it was before all of that happen?

I was happy.

I was a normal girl. As normal as it could be in my family.

I wasn't punished by my father.

"But you wouldn't have Harry.", a quiet voice said in my head, which brought even more tears.

Harry.

And my world collapsed as the door opened and I heard hurried footsteps. But I didn't look up. I didn't had this strength either. I wasn't able to move or to be strong at this moment.

I felt supportive arms around me when I was pulled against a person who gently rocked me and stroked slightly my head. Quiet and soothing words were heard, but I didn't listen nor understand them. I couldn't record anything. I wasn't able for anything.

"She's done.", Rebekah whispered but not to me.

I sobbed and took after it a deep breath. My eyes were closed and I felt tired.

Tired from crying.

Tired of mourning.

Tired of the world.

"You have to be strong!", I thought.

Slowly I pressed Rebekah away from me and stood slowly up. My hair fell over my shoulders as she had helped me up. I moved away from the sitting area, and brushed back my hair before I wiped the innumerable traces of tears away and sniffled quietly.

"This is all a bad joke.", I shook my head, put one hand against my waist and covered my forehead with the other. "A really bad joke."

"None of this is real.", I nodded slowly. "I thought my parents hate me for what I did. For what I did let happen. For not fighting against what happen. For let it come so far. For not stand against it. Perhaps ...", I shrugged. "... doing an abortion. I'm not married. I don't have the permission to have my own children. I don't have anything."

I laughed. "My father has banished me from the family. He said that I'm no longer his daughter. I have accepted it that way. I mean, I can't do anything about it. I could try and talk to him, but that wouldn't change a thing."

I pressed my lips together. My back was still turned in her direction. "The last weeks I learned to live with the fact that he don't love me anymore how a father could love his own daughter. He has still five other to love.", I nodded again. "And then I read a letter from my mom and my world turns back on its head again."

I closed my eyes. "I'm a mess."

"No you're not."

I frowned slightly. The voice was strange to me. I didn't know her. To whom it belongs? For a moment I was distracted and opened my eyes. I saw first over my shoulder before I slowly turned to the sitting area and studied the unknown person.

"Who is she?"

Her brown wavy shoulder-length hair framed her face advantageous. She leaned with a compassionate expression in the armchair. Her legs overturn she laid her head slightly inclined.

"You don't know me."

"I don't need to, to tell that you aren't a mess.", she explained slightly smiling. "And you know why?"

"Why?", I asked somehow interested at her answer.

"You're standing here in front of me.", she started. "You're pregnant by a man, you don't even know that long. You wouldn't be if Klaus wouldn't have ordered his witches, to speak their magic spells. But that isn't what I wanted to say."

She pressed her lips shortly together: "What I was about to say is: You're alive, Lisa. And that wouldn't be every human person who has come into contact with Klaus. We are talking about an original vampire. You're needed and not just from him. You're father is your smallest problem. You got so many behind you. We are here ...", she looked from me to Rebekah and back to me. "You are not a mess, Lisa. You have to stay straight."