Sex addict + Luh

T w e n t y

|Ariana|

Warning: this chapter may trigger you. It includes drug abuse and major alarming sexual events.

2 weeks later.

I slip on my knee socks and look up at Maxine. "Maxine let me stay home please I'm not ready to be socializing with society." I plead.

I look around her messy room, my things neatly placed in the corner and her stuff scattered about the room. My mom had been letting me come here without punishment because her and her husband, who I hated dearly, were arguing.

My mom was better off without him, before him we were fine, we were happy.

He has brainwashed my mom into being a whole other person, and the only person it effected was me. My stepfather had a son of his own but he was in college and was never around.

She gives me a concerning look and sighs. "Ariana you need to get out. Your coming."

I grunt and put on my grunge looking heels. My outfit consisted on a white crop top and overalls. I wore the necklace that Derek gave me, I missed him.

No progress was made, with Derek that was. I still cried over him most of the time and regretted every moment of the event.

The only thing that really did change was that I was seeing a therapist, my mother agreed to it as long as I continued going to the sex addict group.

I am not an addict, I can stop when I want to. I have stopped.

But that was where I was wrong, I am an addict but not a sex addict. I'm a Derek addict, I craved his touch and the way that he felt inside of me.

I wanted him.

I needed him.

I miserably accepted my moms deal because obviously I couldn't pay for the therapist myself.

My trust money kicked in once I leave High school which means I can be an independent. I can break away from my mother.. because I'll be rich.

My therapist and I are working on things like why I can't seem to commit to anyone.

She helped me over see why I hadn't been able to commit, it was because my issue of being abandoned and being used.

I had feared for so long that I was going to have to go through both those things all over again.

I didn't want to feel those types of ways ever again but how can you control that. I thought that I was controlling it with choosing to reject Derek but even if I didn't there was still a chance I could've avoided those feelings.

My father leaving my mother and I was a huge problem and all my past boyfriends have been to blame for the feeling used part.

My therapist says that both these things can be solved put it required much determination to get better.

I was willing to. I was willing to get better.

"Ariana come on." Maxine said interrupting my thoughts. I walk on to the front door and exit walking towards the car.

"Who's party is it?" I ask curiously but then again us seniors have party's just because our parents are out of town or something so it didn't really come as a shock to me that a party was going on.