Addison is a school teacher living in New York when she becomes a victim of rape. The Special Victims Unit tries to connect the dots of the crime, leading back to a prominent family of the city. Sonny Carisi is the lead detective on her case, and th...
We sit on the couch and watch wheel of fortune together. Sonny's phone rings and he excuses himself and goes to another room. When he comes back in his eyes are shadowed with something, averted from mine, "what's wrong?" I ask, worried it was Bella who called.
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"There's uh.. that was Benson." He sits next to me. I wait with a knot in my stomach for him to go on, "they got the evidence back from your rape kit. There was a problem with the chain of custody and uhh, that evidence is out." He informs me, "I'm so sorry Addison." He puts his hand on my knee.
"What?" I spit with my mouth gaped open. "How.. how--" but I don't complete my sentence, not sure what to even say. He doesn't say anything either and my heart beats quickly inside my chest as I think through everything that happened since Jason called me over two weeks ago, "I'm... I'm trying to be strong here detective but I don't know--" I put my hand to my stomach, "I don't know how much more of this I can take."
"Hey, hey" he puts a finger to my chin, lifting it up slightly, "we're gonna get whoever did this to you, I promise." He affirms.
"What do you mean whoever?" I question harshly, forcing my chin away from his hand, "it was Jason Charles. You don't believe me either?" I ask lowly. He's the one who came to my apartment, he's been there the whole time and now he doubts me too? I can't help but starting thinking of all the ways Jason could have pull and get everything on him thrown out.
He inhales deeply, "that's the other thing. Even though the evidence is out, they ran the DNA and it didn't match Jason's. He's not your rapist." Everything stops then. I feel myself go numb and my brain go blank. What is he saying? How could it not be Jason? I saw his tattoo, I know it was him. "Addison, breathe. Breathe." Sonny's voice calls to me and brings my attention back to reality. "I promise we'll get this guy." He says again "I promise."
"How?" I ask in a whisper, letting a tear escape my eye. He pulls me close into his chest and I let myself weep for the first time since it happened. This whole time I thought I knew who did this to me, I thought that made it worse. But now I see that it's not. Not knowing who did this is worse, it could be anyone on the street. It could be someone I met once a long time ago or a complete stranger. When I wake up, the room is dark and only the light from the television illuminates my surroundings. The volume on mute and my feet rested across Sonny's lap, "Carisi?" I whisper to him, trying to wake him up, "Carisi?" I say again sitting up and off of him.
"Mmmm." he stirs awake, "I told you, call me Sonny." His eyes continue to flicker to get used to the dark.
"Sorry" I whisper back, "and I'm sorry about before." I refer to me crying and falling asleep on him.
He shakes his blonde hair, which is now more disheveled, "don't be. I'm sorry I had to give you that news, I know this can't be easy for you."
"I just--" I sigh out before continuing, "I just want to move on, and I thought after the line-up, things would get easier," I tell him honestly.
"You think about talking to someone about all this?" He asks me.
"I am," I say back with a small smile even though he probably can't see it.
He chuckles, "yea, you are." He says simply, "but a professional would be able to give you better advice than some dumb ol' cop." He says quoting the insult I threw at him the night he came to my apartment.
I laugh back at him, "I didn't mean that." I say. He holds up his hand and nods, knowing that I didn't mean what I said "and besides, I'm a teacher, I could never afford a therapist." I shake my head.
"We can give you numbers. There are groups and therapists that will work with you, no cost." He tells me.
I shrug, "I guess I could look into it." I yawn, feeling tired again, "but I'm gonna go back to bed, I'm actually tired right now." I say to him, putting my head back down on the pillow and closing my eyes.
"Goodnight Adds," Sonny says back.
I lift my head, "you're gonna stay here, on the couch?" I ask, wondering why he wouldn't go to the bedroom.
"If that's okay? I'm pretty comfortable here." He eyes me. I nod once and put my head back on the pillow again, feeling more comfortable with him there anyway.
"Addison?" A voice calls to me and I flutter my eyes open quickly, my heart beating fast, "it's just me, Sonny." He holds up his hand in surrender.
"Sorry, I'm still jumpy," I tell him, sitting up and pushing the blanket off of me.
"I have to go to the office. I made a pot of coffee and Anastasia is in her playpen. Would you mind watching her until they get back?" He asks me.
"Of course!" I nod, rubbing the crust from my eyes. That was the best nights sleep I got since the attack, "we'll hang out and watch cartoons." I mumble standing up to go pick up the little girl.
"You're the best! Thanks! Call me if you need anything." He says throwing on his jacket over his three suit vest. He leans down towards me and kisses me on the cheek. I freeze up and he steps away awkwardly, realizing what he just did, "I'm so sorry about that Addison. I--I don't know why I just did that." He apologizes quickly his blue eyes wide with regret.
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"It's okay, no worries." I shake my head trying to think of it as nothing.
"You sure?" He asks, heading to the door.
"Positive. I'll see you later." I affirm and he nods leaving the apartment. I lock the door behind him and turn the television on to a children's network channel. While sitting with Anastasia in my lap, I try not to think about Sonny's smooth chin and soft lips brushing against my cheek.
