Drowning in you

•thirteen•

Tyler's hands were charcoal black just like they were on stage. He ran one hand over the other, feeling the way his skin rubbed together, papery skin pulled taught over fragile bones. He was alone in a room, at least as far he knew, ever swirling tendrils of Deep charcoal grey fog curling around his legs and arms. He heard a soft whimper coming from somewhere near him, quickly followed by a quiet sob. He forcefully shifted one of his feet, then the other toward the sound. The fog tried to hold him back, but it wouldn't stop him. He knew what this was, just another nightmare, he had imprisoned blurry in his own shadowy kingdom, never to harm Tyler again. He struggled forward, it was like the feeling you get when you turn your back on the ocean, and the waves surge past your ankles, then rush back pulling at your feet, trying to force you back into their salty ocean home.

He finally came close enough he could make out a hunched figure slightly obscured by the fog. He saw a shock of grey hair on top of the figures head. It was dull and seemed to have lost all its ability to stand up, instead laying flat and dejectedly atop the persons head.

" are you ok?" Tyler asked softly. The figure stiffened, and turned to face Tyler slowly. His shoulders stopped shaking, and Tyler could hear no more sobs. The figures head was bent, and Tyler couldn't see his face. Slowly inch by inch he lifted his head. It was josh.
It was josh but not josh, like a wax figure. Yes the face was proportional, the crooked nose and full lips were there, but everything was slightly off. His mouth no longer held his playful smile , his skin was sallow and his cheeks bones more prominent. Tyler then looked josh in the eyes, and saw something he had never seen before.
Those eyes once so bright and joyful had lost that shimmering quality that never failed to draw Tyler's attention. They were a dull dusty brown, something was broken in them. Large salty tears leaked out of his eyes, chasing each other across his cheeks until they fell. Tyler gasped, joshes sadness afflicting pain in
him.
How could this happen, he had just seen josh on stage glowing with health. What was happening how could he whither and break so quickly. Tyler reached out a hand tentatively, brushing tears from Josh's cheek. His skin was cold to the touch. Josh looked up at him, despair written in the canvas of his face. Josh's hand struck out, pushing Tyler away. Tyler drew back, hurt by the fear in joshes face. But the fear was quickly turning to anger.
" josh what happened?" Tyler whispered, his voice dry.
Josh looked at him with contempt.
" all those years I listened to you Tyler," he spat, " you were such a delicate broken boy. I helped you, I stayed up all night being your shoulder to cry on. I was the one who saved you so many times from your self." He paused letting in a shuddering breath.
" and what did I get in return Tyler? Nothing, nothing at all. I was always supposed to be the support column, the one there to steady you when you needed to be held up. Did it ever occur to you that with every day I cracked under the pressure of supporting you, with every day I died a little more. I'm nothing more than a shadow of the man I used to be, all the happiness, all the sanity has been eaten away. And it's all your fault Tyler, you were to selfish to see past your own troubles, And look what you've done." He pointed at his own frail body. " life's not worth it when you have nothing to live for, you should know that better than anyone Tyler." He said the words rolling off his tongue with hate.
" so I hope you enjoy your career, hope you have the happily ever after you stole from me. I hope I haunt you every step of the way, I hope it hurts, I hope it burns your heart, I hope it washes away all the happiness. Go to hell Tyler. Go. To. Hell."
Joshes eyes filled with tears once again, and he reached into his pocket. Tyler watched in horror as in slow motion josh pulled a gun out of the pocket of his sweatshirt. He looked Tyler in the eye, the brown of his brittle cold ones meeting Tyler's warm ones, and raised the gun to his temple.
" josh no don-" Tyler shouted surging forward, but it was too late.
Bang.
The sound quaked though Tyler's bones, echoing though his brain. Waves of despair slowly suffocating his heart. Panic flowing though him, pulling him apart.
" JOSH" he screamed in desperation but no sound came out. His lungs were filling with the smoke swirling around him, he chocked. His throat was closing, he was shaking. He tried to gasp in air but there was too much smoke. Not enough air. The last thing he saw before the smoke obscured everything was Josh broken at his feet.

" Tyler! Tyler are you ok?" Tyler's eyes shot open, and Josh's concerned face swam into view.
" ty you were having a bad dream, you were screaming are you ok. Tyler are you ok?"

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- Samantha