Dull future.

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So the other day I got a call. I didn't answer it because I didn't recognize the number and they left a voicemail that I just now listened to. Apparently I messed up another application. So um yeah. I have this awful feeling that I'm going to just fail at life, actually. Not just fail right now but in the long run and damn, it would be easy to end it all. I'm so unfocused and it's getting to the point where it's too late to focus. I literally have no freaking clue what I'm doing. I'm so confused and frustrated and I don't want to deal. I can't, I just can't. I'm so scared. I thought I was doing okay. My grades are fine enough they could be better, my SAT score isn't great but I have several extra curricular activities, lots of volunteer hours, stellar recommendations. Where did I go wrong. Why don't any colleges want me? I'm graduating summa, I'm graduating distinguished. Yet I cant get into college. Why.

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