Write it Down so I Don't Forget

Damn you Kane! (Again)

Okay so the group was just over and we have this thing where we read wikihow articles and demonstrate them. Usually we do relationship type articles. The one we read tonight was "how to get over your crush", Kane typically reads them, one of the steps was to distance yourself, and he was reading it and it said, "if you are close friends try to make yourself less available". I immediately was like "bye Kane." We all died laughing. It was great. Basically I hinted that I still liked him which is still a confusing topic for me. Another tip was to make a list of bad traits of your crush to remind yourself to stop liking him. We were talking about my crush on Zane, so the list would have been about him. Kane was so ready to make that list. He was like "okay let's do it, all the bad things about Zane." He was way too over zealous to shit on him. Seemed like he wanted me to stop liking him.... idk though. We were outside choreographing a fight, then we got off topic and started taking about how to approach people and doing awkward introductions. At one point we were talking about something mildly intimate, I can't remember what, and Kane and I both went to demonstrate. The thing is that he went to demonstrate it with me and I went to Claire so it would be less awkward. I played it off like I was swerving his advances and we all laughed again, but  looked mildly uncomfortable.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At one point we were going to drop Erin off, but only Claire went so Kane and I stayed behind. We went back into my house and went on Netflix, we sit talked about different shows we like and I went through my list recommending and describing each show. It was fun. When Claire got back he was like "we bonded over Netflix" because right before Claire came back we were taking animatedly about the show Heroes. Which is a really cool show btw the first season is the best. And we were recalling the really good episodes and our favorite characters, it was really fun because I've never been able to talk about it with anyone. It was nice. Throughout the night I was going back and forth between, "he's such a great friend" and "ugh I think I still like him". We also danced a bit while we were outside. ☺️ Which is fun. He spun me and stuff. Ugh under the fucking stars how can you not question your feelings for a guy!?? Lol but I do like Zane, I want to get to know him more, I feel like there is more than meets the eye. Which sounds super cliche but I really think so. I've gotten glimpses of his deeper side and I like what I've seen. He's adorable and really sweet when he wants to be. Kane had his chance so I feel pathetic going back when I've begun moving forward. So FUCK YOU KANE! On the bright side, The babies at coming over tomorrow for dinner!! Oh and my make up today looks amazing, just saying. 😂😂
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh I also forgot to mention while we were pretend fighting we acted as if we were in a 90's video game and we bonded over how low tech they are and made fun of the avatars. Lol it was great.