This is not the end~ Fourth book in PLMI series

This is the one.-16

-Britt's POV-
I'm buzzing. I'm jumpy. I'm excited. I can't contain my excitement. At. All. Even after we talked about Audrey, Mackenzie seemed to mellow out.....she became more quiet. But...I'm still hyper. Kendall seemed totally calm and almost a bit sad. I saw her crying in the car, because of Audrey. I miss her too. Even though I wasn't that close to her. She didn't deserve to die. Neither did Jake. Or Mackenzie's father or her brother. Or my grandparents. Or....anyone.
Oh well. As Mackenzie had said....it is written in the stars and can't be changed. It's permanent. I hope I go to heaven, so I can see each and every one of them.
"Come on Britt!!" Alexa yelled and I snapped out of my trance. I ran into the store with all my girls, a smile coming on my face as I saw all the white. We were going to shop for bridesmaids dresses as well today. Might as well hit it all at once......right?
"Hello. How can I help you today?" A girl, about mom's age asked us kindly as we all walked in.
"Hey. I'm.....looking for a wedding dress." I said awkwardly, not knowing what to do.
"Okay. When is the wedding?" She asked politely, leading us through the store. The walls were lined with dresses. Some colored. Some white. Even some black ones.
"December." I replied and she looked back at me and smiled.
"Wow. So soon? How cute." She replied and I smiled. "What exactly do you think you're looking for.....?" She asked and I tilted my head, thinking for a moment. I don't want anything too expensive. I'm paying for it myself.......
Of course Liam didn't agree......He wanted to at least help pay for it, but I won't let him. He already paid for so many things of mine. Plus....I've been saving for this for a long time.
"Something simple.....not too expensive." I replied. She smiled and led us into a small room with a curtain, which I assumed was a dressing room.
"You girls can sit in here while I go see what we have. Make yourselves comfortable." She said and I shifted.
"Thank you." Mackenzie said as she sat down next to me, crossing her legs over one another picking at a thread on her jeans like she did when she was nervous or scared....or bored.
Alexa turned to me, tears brimming her green eyes. "You're getting married." She whispered. Mackenzie looked up and Kendall laughed. I hugged Alexa tightly and she smiled over my shoulder.
"I wish Louis would ask me to marry him."she sighed and I rolled my eyes.
"You know how Louis is....he'll get around to it eventually. He's probably just not ready." I replied. She nodded, looking down.
"This is so exciting." Kendall stated, smiling at me and trying to avoid the tension growing from Mackenzie's silence.

-Mackenzie's POV-
"I wish Louis would ask me to marry him." Alexa sighed and I looked down at my hands.
Would Niall and I get married? Am I ready for that commitment? Could I stand it? What will he think when he.....finds out......? I don't usually keep secrets from him.....but...this? This is...embarrassing. I feel like it would break his heart. Will he still love me? I have to tell him.....eventually I suppose....I was going to tell him yesterday.....but I just....couldn't. He was...so happy. I didn't want to ruin his day with my problems. Actually...I've been hiding more and more things from him lately......just because I don't want to hurt him. He's so sweet and carefree. And...he's been through so much......I don't want to break him. But....he can't fix this with his kisses. He can't fix this problem. He can't. There's no way. Just like his cancer. It's incurable. He's supposedly cancer free....but there are a few cancer cells left in his lungs that the doctors couldn't manage to get out. So.....his cancer will most definitely come back. The doctors told him he was cancer free. Giving him a false sense of security. I think he deserves to know....but I don't have the heart to tell him and neither does Liam. That's not the secret I'm keeping though. Sure....I'm hiding that....but that's not the worst thing that I have to tell him.
Trey took a whole bunch from me. My innocence. My happiness. Even Niall at one point. Sure...I was upset when Niall was kidnapped.....but this....this goes.....deeper, it's more personal. What he took from me....it.....it can't be replaced. And I'm sure it will hurt Niall too, because I know who he is. His heart is so big. This...this will hurt him. Perhaps more than me. I'm not going to tell him. I can't.
"Mackenzie? You okay?" Britt asked from next to me as I felt tears brimming at my eyes. I swallowed my sadness and put on a fake smile for the benefit of my best friends. I didn't need to bother them with my screwed up life.
"Yes. Of course!" I said, my fake happiness seeming to bubble over while my heart broke. I just want to cry, I'm all out of strength. I want to give up. But I know I can't. I don't feel strong anymore. I want to melt into Niall's arms and sob for hours on end. That's all I want right now. But...I have to be here for my friend. I'm happy for her. She needs me now and I will swallow my grieving for today.
"Okay! Here we go!!" The lady said as she came back in with a handful of wedding gowns, making me smile genuinely. Britt looked up at me and her and the lady went into the dressing room to try on the first dress.
She tried on various ones for awhile and I had to say....I thought we would never find one....simply because we couldn't agree. I didn't really like any of them. None of them...fit her. Her innocent personality. I sighed as she came out in another one, making me sigh. I didn't like that one either.
"Do you mind if I go in with her?" I asked the lady. She shrugged.
"Sure." She answered. I nodded and left them all outside. I looked at Britt, who was looking in the mirror with a disapproving glance.
"Truth. Do you like any of these?" I asked as I pointed at the wedding gowns laying around the dressing room. Britt scrunched up her nose and shook her head.
"Not really, no." She admitted, pulling off the dress that she had on. I sighed, running a hand through my hair.
"Wait here. I've got an idea." I said, limping back out. "Can I see some of the dresses?" I asked the lady. She nodded kindly and motioned for me to follow her. I limped behind her, my foot hurting like a bitch.
"Here.........this is where I've been getting them. These are more simple.....down that way are more expensive and frilly....if you know what I mean...." the lady said and I nodded. "You can look around for awhile." She said, I nodded. The lady walked out and I searched through the endless racks of white silk fabric. I searched for what seemed like a long time...nothing catching my eye.
Until.....I saw a beautiful flowy looking dress hanging at the end of another rack. I frowned and picked it up, before a smile came up on my face. This was....perfect. I quickly grabbed it and carried it back into the dressing room to Britt. I shoved it in her hands. She winced and wrinkled her nose. She doesn't like it?
"Please try it on!! I promise you'll like it!" I pleaded and she sighed, pulling it out of the plastic. The dress was so beautiful. It will fit her perfectly. I can tell.
She slowly pulled the dress on and I was practically jumping in excitement. She'll love it. I know it. I gasped as she looked in the mirror while I zipped up the dress.
"Oh. My. Gosh." She whispered, putting a hand over her mouth. She had tears brimming in her eyes, making me smile widely.
"You....you look.....beautiful.." I whispered and she smiled, laughing as she faced me. The dress fit her body perfectly. Her curly hair fell down her shoulders in a cute way, making her look so very beautiful.
"This....this is the one....." she whispered, pulling me in for a hug. I laughed and hugged her back.
"Let's show them...." I said, pulling back the curtain. Alexa gasped and Kendall smiled, her eyes lighting up.
"Oh. My. Gosh. That....that's beautiful!!" Alexa said, smiling. Kendall stood up and rose her eyebrows, her eyes moving up and down Britt. She smirked and nodded approvingly.
"Wouldn't be my first choice for me anyways....but on you...it's perfect. Liam will simply drop to his knees." Kendall said and Alexa snorted.
"She will be on her knees on their honeymoon......" she mumbled underneath her breath, just loud enough for every one to hear. I snorted and Britt blushed a shade of bright red.
"Is this the one?" The lady asked, not hearing Alexa's dirty joke. Britt nodded straightaway.
"Yes. This is the one." She confirmed, feeling the silky fabric between her fingers.