This is not the end~ Fourth book in PLMI series

No reason to be sorry-56

-Mackenzie's POV-
It was about 9:00. I had finished my shooting for my video, had two interviews and another acoustic performance. In all honesty, I was exhausted. No. That's an understatement. I felt like death I was so tired. I felt my phone start to buzz in my pocket and I leaned against the door and answered it, glancing at Britt, who was standing behind me.
"Hello?" I answered, not even bothering to look at the caller ID.
"Hey love." Niall's voice came over the phone. He sounded scared. "We're on our way. We just got out of our last interview." He explained.
"Okay." I sighed. I heard Niall sigh with me.
"Babe. I really am sorry." He sighed. I frowned.
"We'll talk at home." I said quietly.
"Are you okay?" He asked, his voice laced with concern.
"Yeah. Just tired. Hurry up. See you in a bit." I said, hanging up at him. I was still mad at him, but I was too tired to fight about this over the phone. Britt and I stood by the door and I heard some footsteps behind us. I saw Jeremy and Sam coming towards us. I wondered why Jeremy was still here....but I guess he did have to play for my other acoustic performance so.....
"You ladies need a ride?" Sam asked. I shook my head politely.
"No. It's okay. Someone's coming for us. But thanks Sam. For...everything." I said quietly, hugging him tightly. He nodded and hugged me back for once, pulling back to kiss my head like a father would do.
"No problem sweetheart. Take care....okay? I'll see you the first night of your tour." He said. I quickly hugged Jeremy too.
"You'll be there?" I asked. He nodded, smiling. Both him and Jeremy left, leaving me and Britt alone.
"Here they come." Britt said, motioning to the van which pulled up outside. The snow was falling lightly outside and it was cold as we opened the doors and hurried outside, running to the van. I slipped in the back next to Niall, who gently grabbed my hand in his and pulled it up to kiss my knuckles. I felt tears sting my eyes. My anger floated away, instead being replaced by sadness and regret. Thankfully, neither Liam or Britt were in the back, just me, Harry, and Niall. Harry wouldn't question because he knows about me not being able to have children. How? Well, I told him. I didn't have the heart to tell any of the girls or Britt or Liam because I didn't want them to feel bad for me. But strangely, I knew that Harry wouldn't feel sorry for me. He's literally one of the ones that I find it the easiest to talk to as a friend. Liam's too much like a brother, I don't know Zayn that well, and well........Louis is Louis. I always talk to Niall, but Harry just seemed to be...there. And plus, whenever him and Kendall had a fight, he would come over to our flat instead, seeking someone to talk to. I would always talk to him because, he understood. And I understood his problems. I don't know why, but we've gotten closer as friends, and....I honestly didn't mind. I mean.....Niall understood that I needed someone besides him to talk to. In a way, Harry was like my therapist, and I was like his. I know, all this sounds a bit strange, but it's kind of true.
I started to cry silently into my hands, my anger and my sadness coming out at the same time, making me want to scream. I cried quietly into my hands while Niall gently pulled me into his lap and let me cry into his chest. He sighed, kissing my hair and stroking it as I cried.
"Shhhh....shh....baby. Shhh....it's okay. I'm here. It's okay." Niall whispered in my ear, trying weakly to calm me.
"I'm going insane." I whispered to him. He only held me that much tighter, stroking my hair. "These voices won't leave me alone...."
I felt another hand go on my back and I turned to see Harry smile sadly at me. I let the tears fall down my face quickly, dropping to Niall's knee as we pulled up to our flats. Niall gently slid me over onto Harry's lap, whispering something to Harry. I clung to Harry's shirt and he sighed, wrapping his arms under my legs and getting out of the van, carrying me bridal style in to our flat. I pretended to be asleep, burying my face into Harry's shirt so that Britt or Liam wouldn't see me crying and ask questions.
"Is she asleep?" I heard Britt ask.
"Yeah. She's pretty tired out from today." Niall answered as we walked into our flat. I felt Harry shift me into Niall's arms and he carried me into our room.
"Hey Haz. Cmere. I need to....umm...talk to you." Niall stammered, carrying me into our bedroom, Harry following him (I'm assuming) and shutting the door. I opened my eyes and begun to cry again, my sobs loud in the room. Niall sat me down on the bed and I curled into the blankets, burying my face in Niall's pillow, trying to breathe in his scent and focus on that, not all the pain I was feeling right now.