Don't Believe Everything You Read On the Internet

Chapter 34

       Batman entered Wayne Manor and announced his presence. Robin called back, telling his father that he was glad he was home. Then, he walked down to the entry way to greet his father in person. He gave Batman a large hug, which startled the hero at first, but quickly returned it. The boy was still in his karate outfit, belt and all. Batman noticed that he was wearing a brown belt now, which excited the vigilante. His son was very good at martial arts for someone his age, which made his belt color make sense. Then again, Joker might've forced the instructor to give him the belt for all he knew.

          "Did you catch Harley and Ivy?" Robin asked.

        "I made them pay for their stuff, but I let them go 'cause J convinced me to. So, brown belt, huh?" Batman asked his son, a smile showing on his masked face.

        "Yeah, apparently I've been doing so well with my lessons that my teacher said that I should be a black belt in no time!"

         "I'm so proud of you. Are you okay with me leaving early? I'm really sorry, I know this meant a lot to you."

        "After breaking those boards, I didn't really do a lot else. Plus, I still had one dad there for me!"

          "Woah, you're already considering Joker as your other father?"

         "I mean, I know you two aren't getting married anytime soon, you did just start dating after all, but during my time in the orphanage, I would always fantasize about having a nice and happy couple become my parents. I was almost happier when I was adopted by you, but it would be amazing if I could have Batman and a happy married couple be my parents."

           "Well, I'm sure Joker will be honored that you think of him so highly."

         "Thanks, Batdad."

        "No problem, Dick," Batman replied, giving his son a kiss on the forehead.

.....

        While Joker was driving home, he found something on the passenger seat of his vehicle. It seemed to be a stray batarang that had been left there by Batman. Joker assumed that it must have been left there accidentally on their first date, and since he wasn't very far from Wayne Manor, he turned his car around to go back there. However, he always went home from Wayne Manor on a different street than he always went there on, so he got lost. He found himself practically driving in circles while trying to navigate the island that Wayne Manor was located on. When he did eventually find the manor, it was 45 minutes later than he should've been. He knocked on the door with the batarang held behind his back. Batman didn't answer the door, but instead, it was Bruce Wayne.

        "Hey, babe!" the man said before giving Joker a kiss on the cheek. Joker stood there, shocked. Bruce Wayne, who barely ever talked to Joker, was now treating him like they were some type of couple. Joker's eye twitched, the shock turning into total confusion.

       "I'm sorry, what was that about, exactly?" Joker asked the billionaire, gesturing to his cheek. Bruce looked down at his shirt, a look of panic crossing over his face.

        "Woops, I thought I was someone else. I mean, I thought you were someone else. You see, I'm dating this green-haired chick, and I thought you were her for a moment. I'm not trying to start anything, just so you know. I'm not the type of person to flirt with his roommate's boyfriend at all," Bruce said, nervously.

         "You have a girlfriend, now? That's cool, I guess. When can I meet her?" Joker asked.

         "She's... moving this week, and I, or anybody else, will see her again."

         "I'm sorry, you must be devastated."

         "Nah. Being such an aristocratic social butterfly, I meet new people often. I'll meet another girl someday. Anyway, is there a reason you decided to show up?"

        "Uh, Batsy left his batarang in my car, and I figured that I should return it. Is he home?"

       "He's taking a nap. Fighting crime really makes you tired, you know?"

      "Yeah. No, actually, I've never fought crime, I do them in the first place. Do the crimes, that is. I commit crimes," Joker stumbled with his words. He didn't know what had gotten over him. He was so collected in the car, why was he so flustered, now? Bruce chuckled and grinned. Joker's cheeks lit up at the gesture, and he hated himself for doing so. He was so happy with Batman, it was too late to change his mind now. Besides, he knew Batman like the back of his hand, and he barely knew Bruce at all. Joker knew he would get over Bruce in a week, but he felt guilty nevertheless.

       "So, I heard that you and B-man went to Best Buy earlier," Bruce started the conversation again.

         "Well, with Batman there, it was actually Best Bi," the clown joked, a bead of sweat falling down his forehead.

         "That's what I just said," Bruce replied, not understanding the joke.

        "I meant bi as in bisexual. It's a lot funnier written out. I just assumed he was bi because he's been with a lot of women and now he's with... me." Joker was suddenly hit with the realization that he was flirting with his boyfriend's roommate. Still, Bruce had kissed him on the cheek. So, what was up with that?

         "Oh, now I get it. Handsome and funny, I can see why Batman wanted to be with you," Bruce told the villain, giving him a quick wink. Joker's soft blush turned into him becoming a strawberry's cousin. He couldn't tell if Bruce was deliberately flirting with him or if Joker was just jumping to conclusions. Either way, Joker couldn't help but stare into Bruce's dreamy eyes and luscious hair... The clown shook his head and stuck out his hand, the batarang still in it.

         "Here you are," he said, turning his face away from Bruce. The billionaire went out to grab the object. For a split second, their hands touched. Joker pulled away his hand quickly, not wanting to experience what it felt like to touch Bruce, for he knew that he would want more.

    "You know, I should just call Batman and tell him that I found his batarang," Joker told the other man, rubbing his neck.

     "No, he hasn't slept for a while, you should let him get his rest," Bruce responded.

      "How will he know that I found his fighty thingy, then?"

     "I'll tell him when he wakes up. He'll be really sad that he missed you. He loves being with you."

        "Yeah, he's such a sweetheart," Joker said. He sincerely meant that, too. He really thought that Batman was perfect for him. If that was the case, then why did he also think that Bruce was amazingly perfect as well. Before he could dwell on this fact, he cleared his throat and walked as fast as he could off of Bruce's porch. He hit himself several times on the forehead, trying to knock some sense into himself. It was no use. He had fallen for his boyfriend's roommate.

Author's Note:

I'm sorry for the long wait! You guys are usually so patient when it comes to these types of things, so I hope that this time wasn't any different. You guys are the best, really! So please, tell me what you think of the story!