Letting Go

Twenty-four

"Alam mo yun, hindi naman kasi sya dapat nagagalit." Umirap ako at nilakihan ang mata ko kay Goy, it was like I'm saying, 'Hello?'

"Eh baka nga kasi may gusto." Goy answered though my statement isn't a query.

I shrugged though it was sort of making me smile yet annoying me.

Kinuha ko nalang ang librong binabasa ko, I started reading pero hindi ako makapag-concentrate.

"Sorry pala sa kahapon." Biglang nagsalita si Hump at umupo sa bin bag sa kwarto ko.

"Okay lang." I smiled.

Tumayo ako at inayos ang sarili ko, "I'll be back later."

"Oh, san punta?" Tinanong ako ni Dara.

Nag-isip ako ng ilang minuto, hindi ko rin alam. I just feel, annoyed this day. Nababadtrip ako na ewan.

"I don't know, somewhere?" Napailing ako.

"Sasamahan kita." Tumayo si Hump at nilapitan ako.

"Hindi na. Babalik rin naman ako."

He nodded.

Lumabas na ako at nagpunta kung saan ako dinala ng mga paa ko.

--

"I never knew you'd be back here."

Lumingon ako para tignan sya, wala namang ibang kilala akong nagpupunta sa lugar na 'to kundi sya.

"Are you mad?" Narinig kong huminga sya ng malalim.

Pero ng tumingin ako sakanya, it's still the same serious face he owns. Tumaliwas ako ng tingin and I stay put.

Naupo ako at sumandal sa may puno, being relaxed by the verdant grass. And all I knew is that-- we're making noise by filling the place a silence.

Naramdaman ko nalang na umupo sya sa may gilid ko, but still, I'm here for a peace of mind. Ayoko munang magsalita.

I was offended by what he meant. Aaminin ko, I have so many crushes at kahit hindi ko kilala ang isang tao, he can brought me infatuation. But this thing is different. Iba ang sinabi nya, what he told me was really offensive.

"I really am a jerk." I heard him crack a little laugh.

Maybe I had been caught by his net, maybe I feel wrong, maybe things are not getting any better. Maybe I got hurt. And it's all because of the puzzle that's getting whole.

I can see the answer to my question.

"I like you." He muttered.

Humarap ako at nakatalikod na sya, habang naglalakad.

"Sorry."

Huminga ako ng malalim. Hindi ko alam kung ano'ng mararamdaman ko. I stared at him for a moment, habang sya, nakatingin kung saan. Nakatingin lang ako sakanya at nakita ko ang pamumula ng tenga nya.

"Don't act as if it was only you."

Nakita ko na napalingon sya. Nag-dadalawang isip ako kung itutuloy ko pa ba na sabihin lahat ng nararamdaman ko.

"N-Natatakot ako na ako ang matalo, pero hindi lang ikaw." And with that, my breath becomes uneasy.