I Saw You In The Water [Joshler]

Thirty one 🐚

Tyler slapped his hand against the cool tiles of his bathroom wall trying to get some kind of grip so he could get out of the bath. His nails dug into the colourful tiles splitting them in half, making pieces of them break off and fall into the bathtub. Tyler watched terrified as his once hands and now claws sliced the tiles like it was warm butter. Tyler splashed the water in his bath, his exhausted legs finally got a grip. Tyler managed to grip onto the edge of the bath and roll out of it. His whole body ached, it felt like his lungs were on fire. His eyes were too sensitive to the light. Tyler punched the light switch and the lamp in the bathroom broke with a loud pop leaving the boy in darkness. Tyler hit the broken light switch a few more times before realizing that the lam is broken and he can see in the dark.  

Tyler tried standing up but his slippery body made even more mess. He knocked everything on the floor, glass bottles and plastic tubes fell on the floor loudly. Tyler's nails dug into the towel in an attempt to dry himself off. Tyler's claws got caught in the cloth and Tyler started shaking it vigorously trying to take it off. Tyler hissed unintentionally out of frustration and slapped a hand against his mouth when he realized what he just did. That hiss came out of his throat like it was natural. Tyler managed not to poke his eyes out when he dried his face off with a towel. The boy tried to calm down and think straight but his heart was racing and his brain was a complete mess.  

Tyler looked and felt terrible, his heart racing, brain synapses firing like a hyped up internal aurora borealis and his insides felt like an organ smoothie. Tyler collapsed on the floor once again gasping for air, slowly darkness enveloped him even if his eyes could see everything brightly. Tyler felt like the whole universe is collapsing, a great weight sat on top of his chest not letting the boy breathe. Tyler's hands shook as he wiped the tears streaming down his now scaly face, he was a monster now. The boy realized that it's his fault that Josh is dead. It's his fault because he was being selfish. Now everyone will know that he's a monster. Inside and out.  

Tyler's eyes darted around the room aimlessly, he tried the breathing exercises his therapist had shown him but it didn't work. Every breath felt like it's just adding fuel to the swirling fire in his throat. Tyler pressed a hand up to his mouth and managed to bend over the sink before his stomach cramped up forging everything that was in it go up. The boy didn't have anything in his stomach.He gasped for air as his throat opened and closed, his stomach spasming out, making his whole body shake. Tyler turned on the water and drank a lot of it so he could throw something up because it hurt.He had to empty his stomach and his body wouldn't stop before he did so.  

Tyler wiped the saliva dripping off his lips and looked at the sink. He saw trails of blood before they disappeared down the sink. Tyler's eyes swell with tears. The boy opened his mouth to vomit again and this time he managed to throw something up and it didn't look healthy. It was bloody and looked like a clump of wet paper only bloody. Tyler turned on the water to wash the blood out and collapsed on the floor crying.   Tyler thought that he had cried enough but salty tears streamed down his face once again. A great tremor took over his body, Tyler could hold the heartbreak no longer and he fell to the floor in a dishevelled heap as his grief poured out in a flood of uncontrollable tears. He clutched the necklace in his shaking fists, the necklace was the only thing left for him of Josh. It was the only thing.No one should be able to cry that hard. Tyler collapsed to his knees once again after an unsuccessful try of standing up. There was a shadow, vague but prominent and taking all Tyler's strength day by day, piece by piece, tear by tear.

Tyler wasn't crying anymore, the sounds that escaped his chest could be only called hysterical screams. Tyler choked on his own tears, his eyes were unable to see anything around him. Tyler laid in a fetal position on the messy floor  naked and shaking, a small puddle of tears pooled under his head. 

"Josh I'm sorry..." Tyler croaked "Josh, I love you, I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I love you so much, please come back to me... I'm sorry..." 

Tyler kept chanting the same thing over and over again like that would change anything. He felt his limbs go back to normal, the scales faded away just in time before his mother walked into the dark bathroom. 

"Tyler?" the woman tried turning on the lights "Tyler, sweety, are you here?" 

Kelly only heard violent sobs and sniffles. She rushed to grab a flashlight. The woman back to the bathroom where Tyler was spasming out on the floor. She had yet to notice the mess Tyler had made.The mess was the least of her problems.  

"Tyler, sweety, can you hear me?" She gently shook the boy but Tyler didn't respond

He kept saying "I'm sorry Josh" over and over again. Kelly was in tears. She managed to drag Tyler to his bedroom and lay him gently on the bed. The woman didn't know what to do, she staid by Tyler's side whispering soothing words till the boy fell asleep. Even asleep, Tyler whimpered and called Josh's name quietly. The brunette clutched at his sheets with his weak hands trying to find the warmth he was so desperate for. Josh wasn't there by his side. 

Tyler was broken and there was no one that could fix him.  

Yet.