Endings and Beginnings

Chapter 13

Don had just changed Brady and sat by his wife as she fed their daughter. "So, want to tell me what the phone call to him was about; my sneaky wife?"

"Are you mad?" Meryl asked as she situated Mags for her feeding; Henry had obviously revealed to his father that she had called him.

Don held Brady as he placed a hard and needy kiss on Meryl's lips; then pressing his forehead to hers. "Did that feel like I was mad?"

"If you are then I need to make you mad more often." Meryl laughed; glad he was in a jovial mood after his awful nightmare. "I'm glad you're not mad; I was afraid you would be but my need to make things better for you was stronger than making sure you weren't mad at me. I didn't betray any confidences."

Don smiled softly at her as he tucked her hair behind her ear. "I wasn't worried about that, Darl. Why after all these months did you confront him about what happened when they all found out you were pregnant? You confronted him about it then. Why now? Why today? You had to have called him before I told you about my nightmare."

"After you woke up from your nightmare you kept saying how he was right and that you didn't protect me; protect us. Hearing you say that, hearing the brokenness in your voice, was just too much for me. I knew he put that damn ridiculous notion in you head." Meryl smiled as him he kissed their daughter's head as she nursed; always wanting to make sure the babies felt both of them when they were nursing. "I would do anything to help you; to PROVE to you that you protect us at all cost. I guess I needed him to understand what he did by saying those things. I didn't do it to hurt him; and I told him how much we both love him. I just hoped I could get through to him so that maybe he could get through to you."

Don started bouncing their son up and down as he became fussy. "Sweetheart, I love you for it. I just don't want this to bring you down."

"When you hurt, I hurt." Meryl said. "I can't have the love of my life, my best friend, the best father our children could EVER have, think that he failed us. That he didn't protect us."

Don gave her a watery smile. "Thank you, Darl. That nightmare just really shook me."

"That's not you, baby." Meryl said with a kiss to his lips as they switched babies and she began to nurse Brady while he changed Mags. "Not in a million years."

Don nodded as he changed their daughter. "I don't know where all that came from. You're the one who went through hell."

"Please stop doing that." Meryl said starting to get upset. "Please."

Don looked up at her from where he was changing Mags as he saw tears appear in his wife's eyes. "Doing what, M?"

"Downplaying what you went through. You have gone through hell as well. You have been my voice and my advocate. You have been my legs and arms. You saw me die. You weren't allowed around our newborn son at first. You weren't allowed in there when our daughter was being born; and at the same time not knowing what was going on with me." Meryl said. "You denying what you have been through is almost like you're denying us; like you're denying our connection and love."

It now hit Don what he was doing by acting like the whole ordeal wasn't awful for him. He held Mags as he kissed his son and then his wife. "I would never deny us; NEVER. You are right; it was pure and utter hell. Those minutes, those months, when I thought I would have to learn to live without you. That I would have to learn to love without my heart and my soul and my breath."

"It's been a hard and long road, my Don Man; but you are the reason I got through." Meryl said placing her free hand on his cheek. "The reason why we are all here. You helped me through; now please let me help you."