He's still haunting me.
He's constantly creeping into my dreams.
He's still in my wild fantasies.
He can still make me feel ecstasy like he always did.
He's still my most favorite nightmare.
A nightmare that I know someday would crash me into pieces...
"You're so hot, Jennifer.." he says in a low voice almost sounding like a whisper, "and so good.."
He continues placing soft kisses on my jawline, neck and bare chest, leaving no unkissed skin. I'm not so much into light kisses all over my body because it honestly tickles me but I don't know why, he's just doing it so good, I don't want him to stop.
He kisses me every skin he can access to and he's touching every part of me while keeping his mouth near my ear to keep on talking dirty to me.
I smile at the thought of his endless compliments about me. He always makes me feel like I'm the most beautiful woman in his life. I'm fully naked and I'm not afraid to show my everything to him cause he always tells me that I'm perfect in his eyes.
He positions himself and matches his hips onto mine as he gives me heavenly pleasure, thrusting into me, making me gasp.
"Ryaaan.."
.
.
.
"MOOOOMMMYYYY WAKE UP!!"
That was Max shaking me on the bed, totally disturbing me from my sleep and I'm totally lost from my dreams.
That dream. I just a had a wet dream. And it was the same as usual. It's been the same for years. It's been Ryan. Again.
I squint as I slowly open my eyes and the morning light, metamorphically speaking, is blinding me.
"Emme and I are gonna be late!" my little boy keeps pulling on me, forcing me to get up from the bed.
"What time is it?" I ask in a sleepy voice as I stretch.
"Almost eight."
Hating the fact that I forgot waking up early and I still had to send the coconuts to school, I sigh and lazily get up. Emme comes rushing to the door, seems like a second demotion of Max.
I went to the bathroom which is in this bedroom, to wash my sleepy no-make-up morning face, so I can send them to school. I wonder if people will still recognize me if I go out in this state. The water in the sink was freezing or maybe just because of the sudden contact on my skin.
Suddenly I feel horrified. Not because of some negative element around or whatever. But because of my dream. I glance at the mirror and see my soaked face. For the nth time he's still haunting me. I can't keep up of how many times he did visit in my wildest dreams. It's been 3 years. Three. Long. Years. We did the deed but only a few times. It was just a hook up then nothing else. I was still with Beau back then. But what if I wasn't? Could it have been more serious? That's the question that was always hanging around and I just keep on ignoring.
Whatever it is, I'm not thinking straight again. And what the heck am I thinking. I'm with ARod and I love this man and Ryan must have a girlfriend his age now. A beautiful and a much younger one than me, of course, and he's happy with her. Maybe I'm just stressed. Right, I might find more quality time with Arod so I can get off from whatever's bothering my mind. And am I crazy? Sometimes I think I hear Ryan's voice in my head. Ugh, crazy Jennifer.
"Mommy let's go!" Emme stumps. She doesn't want to be late at school because late students will be punished.
"Yes sweetie. I'm coming."
As I said that, something else comes to my head. I watch my own reflection on the mirror and bit my lower lip.
'You're so hot, Jennifer..'
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Damn it.
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Hi again! Gosh forgive me for being such an awful person.. Anyway read on, eh?
