ALmost Lost

Chapter 18- "The truth"

Justin's POV

*FLASHBACK* "Can I have a quick moment with you outside?" I spoke hesitantly looking at Selena. She took a moment then nodded yes and we walked to the exit hand in hand. We got out into the night air and Selena instantly looked at me questionably. Fuck this was so hard, having her face to face seemed like a miracle and words just couldn't form right in my mouth. I think I was scared of screwing this moment up with my words and I just couldn't bear ruining this chance again. "Look it's really hard to say this but I feel like I couldn't hold it anymore...I don't even know how to bring this into words” I paused looking at her then looked down. She stood still waiting for me to speak. It was hard admitting but I had to say something. I looked back up at Selena as I found the courage to speak. “Since you left it's been awful, like a hurricane had come over me, nothing seemed to have work out without you and we don't have to do this please I know my feelings towards you and I probably know you feel the same I mean deep down you must still want me like I do" I spoke looking at Selena with hope she’d reply with that I wanted to hear.

But instead she looked down then shook her head no. "I don't want you Justin! I mean Look at what you have become...it's not me that me that made you change....truth is you changed by yourself a long time ago, I just didn’t see it then...There's nothing else to say Justin.... if you keep it like that soon enough you are going to be despised by everyone else; I just really hope you find yourself and be happy" Selena said hesitantly. With that she walked back in leaving me paled by her words. I didn't know what hurt the most hearing her say all those things or actually knowing she truly meant them all and they could be true. I felt an Ocean of sadness run through my body. It was like every organ I had inside died at that moment. Was she right? Nobody would want me?*END FLASHBACK*

I took another drink from the bottle feeling it burn deep down my stomach. As if it would make the memories go away. I had no idea how much I was drinking but I didn't give a fuck. It felt like the burn in my stomach and the light feeling in my head could make it all better. I heard noises coming from the bedroom where I had just laid Rosalyn. I looked at the time that showed 10:39 Am, she must be awake by now. I walked into the kitchen, taking a last gulp from the bottle before putting it back in the kitchen closet where it was and walked towards the bedroom.

Rosalyn's POV

I turned over in bed waking up slowly. My whole body hurt as if I was in a car crash or worse. My eyes filled with tears when I remembered what happened Last night. Justin touched me once again, I felt really dirty and weak. What yesterday was bad today became worse. I slowly threw my feet to the bedside and tried standing up but immediately failed. I almost went falling over my face but instead I took hold of the nearby nightstand and fell down on my knees with a loud bang. Just then I felt 2 strong hands grab me from behind and lifting me back up on my feet. I immediately knew who it was so I try to fight his grip. "I can do it on my own" I protested looking up at Justin whom was holding me tightly. Only feeling his arms around me already made me feel insecure and in danger. I wiggled trying to get out of his grip but he didn't let go."Just let me help you okay" he said looking concerned.

What did he just say?Does he has issues?! Or something! First he beats me, rapes me, then acts like he's jealous, make me tell him I want him, rape me again and now wants to help. What the hell does he think he's doing? I don't want his help!! I don't want anything that has to do with him!! "I can walk" I sternly said glaring straight into Justin’s eyes before waddling off his grip to the bathroom just to hit the floor again but this time he caught me before I was down. Without further words he took me into his arms bridal style and walked me into the bathroom. Before I could say anything we were already in the bathroom and he had leaned me down onto the sink. I immediately pushed my body away from him not wanting to feel him near me and avoided his gaze. He noticed my act of fear and backed off a bit almost looking hurt but I wouldn’t bet on that. It took him a moment before he spoke "we'll get breakfast when you're done" I just nodded in response. He took a last look at me as if he wanted to tell me something but then he walked out of the bathroom closing the door behind him.