ALmost Lost

Chapter 28- Spoken Anger

 

Rosalyn’s POV

I had such an amazing time with Austin that I had completely forgotten about Justin till he was now standing in front of me. I quickly looked up at Austin then back at Justin whom was obviously boiling from inside. “No, we were just done talking” I answered almost hearing my own voice tremble. Austin kind of looked up at me disappointed but then he seemed to have accepted my decision. I felt so bad having to say goodbye like this after the amazing time we had but I couldn’t have done otherwise. If He knew how Justin was he would understand that I was saving him and myself. I’m ready to go” I added, going to stand beside Justin and taking his hand in mine. Justin was so dominated by anger that he didn’t even pay attention to our interlocked fingers at the moment. Justin took some time to look around soothingly before he opened up to speak. “Good! Now I really hope it’s the last time we see you around” He spoke blankly not taking his gaze off Austin.

My eyes went wide as I heard Justin’s solid threat. I couldn’t believe he had just said that, and the way he said it! Gosh! what’s wrong with him?  Austin instantly popped up his head and was about to say something but I intervened. “Austin it’s okay; Justin let’s just go” I said lightly pulling Justin. They’re simple hateful stare at each other were already catching the attention of some people around I couldn’t let this go on any longer. Judging by Justin’s look it would undoubtedly end up in a fight. And there was absolutely no use for that! Plus I didn’t want to see another  fight, the one from the club was scary enough and it was still perfectly fresh in my mind. I gave Justin another light pull at his hands, and this time he conceded with me backing off a bit but before he completely back out he spoke. “Have a nice day” He spat out blankly. With that being said to Austin, Justin turned and started walking outside, dragging me behind him. I walked quietly beside Justin hand in hand till we reached the exit. As soon as we got outside Justin abruptly snatched his hand out of mine, speeding off to the car. I stood right in my spot and watched as he reached the car, getting in and slammed his door closed causing me to lightly flinch.

Some part of me wanted to just run back inside and hide but I knew for a fact now that, that was a silly thought. I pressed my eyes shot inhaling a big breath as I walked up to the car and got in. As soon as I got in Justin clinched onto the gas pedal and took off, without even letting me close the door properly. I gasped at how fast he took off and quickly bent over managing to close the door and sat still in my seat. My heart was pumping like crazy into my chest. I looked over at Justin and he looked really mad and I know for a fact that he was because he almost just threw me out of a car. I looked back to my side and out of my window as I tried my upper most to remain calm and quiet because I didn’t know why Justin was so angry. I mean I did nothing wrong except for talking to a really nice guy that actually treats me like I’m worth something…is that what I’m guilty of? If I’m not mistaken, He was the one who goes around doing whatever he pleases with people and their emotions, like it was nothing. So if there is anybody here who should be mad it’s me! I’m the one who should be hell of pissed at him for everything he’s done and is still doing to me! And matter of fact I am! I am mad!

I could feel the tension rise up to my head as I thought about all of this. The urge to cry was just one more thought away but it got stopped by my own voice astounding me. “Why do you do this?!!” The solid question made its way out of my mouth sternly without a care. Justin looked at me then back at the road clueless of what I was saying. “What the fuck are you talking about?!” He spat out, with a tone of anger in his voice, but I wasn’t gonna stop talking this time. “Why do you do all this?! Why am I here with you when we both know you couldn’t care less about me!!” I spat looking at Justin. He frowns in confusion but before he could say or do anything I continued. “Why have me here when all you want is SELENA!!” I spat out yelling her name. Justin’s face went from confused to shock at what I said. He probably didn’t think that I would ever mention her name.  But I was getting tired of his shit! And he needed to know his truths!! Even if it burnt him I was gonna say it all so I continued.

“It’s visible Justin!! The tattoo on your left hand! The song you lastly recorded, the excitement for showing me off at the AMA’s!! It was all for her!! The meeting with your family! The affection you show me in public! Even those words you just said on tv, are all Lies!! It’s all acts you put in public!! Meanwhile you want to rush to her side!! You don’t care about me at all!! And I dare you!! I dare you to deny a Word I’ve said!!.... I saw you going outside with Selena at the AMA’s!” I burst out catching my breath as I came to a stop. I was going crazy yelling out my lungs at Justin and I didn’t even think of anything twice! I just let go of all my frustrations. I was filled with all kinds of emotions as those word came out of my mouth. My heartbeat was running fast making me have trouble breathing and almost crying.

A silence reigned through the car as Justin didn’t say anything but that didn’t last long as Justin spoke breaking it. “You know what, you’re fucking right! You have it all figured out already and I don’t have to deny anything to you!! The only Girl I’ve loved and will ever Love in this life is Selena! You won’t ever change that!! The only reason you’re here is because you were a stupid and naïve girl that fell right into my traps!! You will never compare to what Selena makes me feel! Ever! Because you’re just a temporary amusement! You will never be more than just that!!” Justin responded back at me with fury. Tears unwillingly filled my eyes; I sat shocked in my seat as Justin burst out telling everything. Every word he said was like a stab in the heart to me. Even though I already knew these things he said, I never thought I’d hear him say them and most of all I never thought it would hurt like this. Maybe somewhere deep down I was hoping he would deny them all.

He was right, I am so stupid! I didn’t want to seem weak I didn’t want to cry, because I knew he didn’t deserve it,  but tears already started pouring down my  face filling me with anger. It was a combination of all the bad feelings together, humiliation, disappointment, sadness, depression, hate and mostly hurt. All these collided inside of me forming a bomb that had to explode. “You’re a monster!! A disgusting monster that doesn’t deserve love from anybody!! Anyone would be too good for you in this life! Leaving you was the best choice Selena ever made because everyone would do the same!! I hope she never comes back to you!!” these words surprisingly flew out of my tongue in anger without thinking twice of what I was saying. I didn’t mean them, I didn’t want them to sound so rude but in the heat of the moment I couldn’t stop myself, I was too hurt.

Justin’s POV

I instantly regretted having said all those things to Rosalyn but hearing her last sentence made an uncontrollable rush of anger inflate through my body, taking over my mind. I couldn’t control myself anymore. Balling up my right fist, I lift my hand and sway it at her face with all my fury. I heard a loud slamming noise as my hand hit her. It all happened so fast I didn’t even take my gaze from the road. My own hand started burning from the hit but I couldn’t pay attention to it as my anger was bigger at the moment. Who the fuck does she think she is!! To say all those things! I thought angrily as I still kept my gaze in front of me. I expected Rosalyn to immediately cup her face and cry but she did nothing. She just sat quiet…too quiet actually. I took my gaze off the road to look at her and I had to look twice. Her head was hanging on the side with her eyes closed and her body was sunk into the seat. My heart froze for a moment at the thought that just went through my head. 

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