Irrevocably (COMPLETED)

CHAPTER FIFTEEN

PERSEPHONE

Every step I took was as heavy as my heart. As I pulled out some of my clothes and necessities. Looking around my room and taking a deep breath..this was it, my ticket to freedom. I know I'm leaving the love of my life behind. I'm leaving my life behind, but I have to do this for me. Not even my mom knows this, she knows I'm happy but I can't risk her. I shouldn't bother her with my problems. I'm a big girl now... I should take care of my own. As sad as it may be my mom wouldn't be there forever for me to lean on, I have to stand by myself and be strong. I'm taking the first step to loving myself and rebuilding me.

I collected my things and walked to the door. When I opened it I saw Zach leaning beside it. He was startled when he heard me open the door.

"You're really going.." He said his eyes looked at my bag.

"I have to..no, I need to," I said with a sad smile on my face.

Don't bring the waterfalls now Persephone you have to be strong.

"And I need you." He said as he placed his hand on my hand the one that was carrying the bag.

"And I need myself back Zach, please don't do this." I pleaded him as I slipped away from his hold and cascaded down the stairs. He walked slowly behind me, faintly but I know he was there, I can feel that he was there.

When I reached the door I turned to him and smiled at him.

"Let me drive you" He offered.

Nope, I'm pretty sure if I agreed. I would still follow my heart. And my heart was wherever he was.

But instead of answering I dropped my bag and ran to him as fast as I could and crushed him in my embrace.

"I love you..so much that it hurts. It shouldn't hurt, but it does. But know that the hurt is there because I love you. Love. Not loved, always will and always have. Please don't forget that. Don't forget me." I said as I cried unto him, This was the last hug I'm gonna get.

He clung unto me as if I was disintegrating to ashes like I was gonna be just a memory. And cried

"I'm sorry I said I regret meeting you, I don't. I'm sorry, you don't deserve me. Heck, I don't deserve you! I keep telling you this because it's the truth, you deserve the best Zach, you deserve everything but that's not me. I love you... I do." I said as I sobbed unto him.

He just held me without saying anything, we just let ourselves feel this. This hug told everything we couldn't.

Our time's up.

I pulled away and held his hand and smiled at him. He squeezed my hand as if to say "go on"

"Promise me one thing," I asked him what he asked me last night.

"When you find someone that blows your breath away, makes you feel everything all at once, someone who makes you smile and laugh. Please, keep her and fight for her. I'll be very happy for you. Your happiness comes first for me and I want nothing but the best for you. When you find her, reach me or find me if not, I'll find you and I'll set you free. You deserve to be genuinely happy, not forced Zach" I said and cradled his head on my hand and kissed his forehead. "I love you" I mumbled against his skin.

I pulled away from him, his head still in my hold

"and oh, Please don't forget to wear mittens when you pull out cookies from the oven," I said and grinned at him while he smiled sadly at me. "Don't search for me, I'll come to you when the time is right. And when the time comes everything is, we'll talk. Goodbye Zach. Take care of yourself." I said and pulled away from him turning my back on the man that I love.

Every step I took felt like an eternity.

"I'll wait for you Persephone. I will." He said and I felt everything inside of me freeze.

"Don't hold yourself back because of me. Do what makes you happy." I said as I opened the door and looked at him.

Standing there with his simple shirt and joggers. I'll miss you, that's what I wanted to say but couldn't instead I just smiled at him as I closed the door. And..walked away.

Okay.

I need to find myself.