The Good Tails

Letter From Me

A/N I know this one's not my usual style, and it's a little short, but I feel like it's a good one.  

Hey Nashi,

I don't know why I'm trying this, but I am. Your mom always seemed to like writing letters to people. So I guess that's why I'm doing this — because your mom liked to do it.

You're still a kid, and I'm sorry. I did something stupid. I hurt your mom, and I hurt you. Damn, I really hate myself, y'know? It's hard to even look at you. You look so much like her. Even though you're just three years old, all I can see is her. I'm kinda glad for it. You're not like me.

It's been awhile since I've been to the house, hasn't it? I'm sorry, Nashi. But it's not my home anymore. It's gone. She's gone. I hope you have fun times with Gray and Juvia. Punch him every once in a while for me — okay? And that little kid of his too. But I guess your mom would want you to be nice to them. So I guess it's really up to you. It's not like I've been the best father figure for you.

Actually, be nice to Gray's little girl. You seem to be really good friends with her. I guess that's another thing that reminds me of your mom. She was friends with everyone. No matter how stupid or mean they were. I mean, she even put up with my idiot self. So be nice, okay? It's obvious you're her best friend. Don't let those friends go, kid. Don't ever let them go.

Damn. I can hardly see the page now. These stupid tears are in the way. But I don't know what I expected to happen when I started to talk about your mom. So there's no one to blame but myself. For any of this. It's all my fault.

I hope that Gray can raise you well for me. I hate the thought of it. But I can't do it by myself. I just can't. Isn't this strange, huh? Me, saying I can't do it and letting Gray beat me. I guess that's just how far I've fallen since your mom.

I'm not sure I'll ever let you read this letter. I'm even thinking of burning it as soon as I'm done. But maybe instead I'll lock it in a box like she used to.

Grow up to be a better man than me, okay kid?

Your dad, Natsu