My Savior (Josh Hutcherson Fan Fiction)

Chapter 36

JOSH'S POV:

I left April's hospital room without saying goodbye to April's mom all I waned to do was cry. As soon as I got to the car I lost control over my emotions I just let everything out. I just cried because for once in a lifetime I actually messed up and there was nothing to do that could fix this'

I finally stopped crying after half an hour and drove. I had no idea where I was going I just let my mind control me. I finally stopped driving and walked to the most important place. The next thing I waned to do was jump off this stupid bridge. This fucking bridge where she waned to jump off where I cought her and helped her fall in love with me. The bridge where we met.

5 MONTHS LATER

I woke up once again with the urge of wanting to not wake up. It's been 5 rough months since I last saw her I thought I would have forgotten about her but I never can. I keep replaying all of our good memories. I sometimes just wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget about the stupid things that hold me from moving on from her.

I took a quick shower and got ready to go to the studio to finish up this stupid movie. Before heading to the studio I did the same routine that I have been doing for the past five months driving to all the places we used to hang out to the bridge where we met to the hospital where we last said goodbye.

I stopped by April's house this time I didn't knock the door I didn't' even leave my car I just stayed in her drive way because that's where we shared our last kissed I still remember how it dealt and the way her lips tasted against mine. I just wonderd if she met somebody new or of she fealt lonely even though he was right beside her?

I finally drove to the studio I was an hour late but honestly I couldn't care less. "Hutcherson you're late again" the director yelled at me "Sorry the traffic here was so intense not my fault this time" I faked an excuse and he just rolled his eyes.

We finally took a break of filming and I just walked to a bench outside and just wonderd off. That's when I started thinking what if what me and April had was just a lie? If what we had was real how could she be fine because I knew damm well that I wasn't fine at all.

I heard the door open and I tiled my head to see who was coming out. It was Rose "Hey want to talk about it?" she asked me I nodded Rose knew everything that happened between me and April as well as I knew why her and her boyfriend broke up. "Rose I still remember everything I still remember the day she told me that she was leaving me that there was no us anymore I remember her make-up running down her face. Does

April remember the dreams we shared  she just left them behind did she even need them? Like every wish we ever made? To be honest Rose these past five months I just wish that I could die or at least wake up with amnesia so I could forget about the stupid little things for example I could forget how it fealt to fall asleep next to her and all the memories that I can't escape." I told Rose "Honestly Josh I wonder the same things but I guess those questions and thoughts are left to be revealed".

We headed back inside and I checked my phone I saw a picture of April that I managed to sneak away one day when she was peacefully reading a book she look gorgeous. I still have all of her pictures in my phone and whenever I see them I just admit I feel even more alone. I got a text message from one of my friends saying "How come you're not around anymore? we miss hanging out with you Hutcherson" I ignored it and headed back to filming.

We wrapped up for the day and I asked Rose if she waned to come over thankfully she said yes. "I'll meet you there in a little while I' going to stop for some food okay" I just nodded. On my way home I headed to the nearest liquor store and bought a bottle of Jack Daniel's and headed to my room.

Rose arrived shortly at my place with Chinese food. "Honestly Josh tell me when was the last time you ate beside drinking alcohol?" Rose asked me with a big smile in her face "It's been a few days" I said and she handed me the container with the food. I ate it and I must admit that I missed eating.

Rose and I were just laying in bed drinking and talking. I took a drink from the bottle of Jack Daniel's before passing it to Rose. "Maybe I'm an idiot but it does hurt me that April is happy and it hurts me even more just thinking that she was able to move on and I haven't" I told Rose. She passed me the bottle back and I drank out of it "For me is fucking hard to hear her name since I haven't her so long" I told her and I passed the bottle back.

I put my head in Rose's shoulder and she layed her hand and I spoke again. "If tomorrow I had the opportunity to wake up with her right beside me, I would just think that all of this was just some twisted dream. I would just hold her closer then I ever did and she will never slip away and I would never talk about wanting to kill myself or wanting to wake up with amnesia so I could just forget about her". I sniffeld and finally just let my tears fall. "I just can't belive how she's fine? and I'm not fine at all. Rose please tell me this is just a dream because I'm not fine at all".

Rose sat up so I sat up as well. "Josh stop crying stop crying over someome that dosen't need you anymore you need to show her that if she dosen't plan on keeping you in her life show her that you don't need her eighter because that's all she wants you to do she wants you to cry about her and she wants you to beg for her because she knows that you're stupid enough to do those things. Just look at her Josh she hasn't even tried to contact you she's too busy being with Logan you're best friend. I wouldn't want someone like that in my life just show her that you don't need her just move on she doesn't deserve you." Rose said to me.

I looked at Rose and she was right I needed to open my eyes because if April needed me as much as I needed her she would have found a way to make us work again but she hasn't even tried. Rose opened up her arms so I could hug her. My head was buried in her neck and she just held me tight. We finally pulled away and I just looked at Rose without her I would be in the streets I'm glad I have someone like her to look after me. I forgot that we were still staring at each other but we did something out of the blue we both leaned in.

The kiss we shared made me feel something I haven't fealt in the longest time it made me feel wanted. Rose was making me feel special and needed just with the taste of her lips.