I check my phone a million times a day waiting for the minute I'm good enough for you to talk to. Or you're bored enough to give me the time of day. I write about you. I cry about you. I listen to music that makes me feel crap for you and think about you. I'm in love with you. And for you to take advantage of that when you don't feel the same is so fucked up. And I don't know what you don't see about that. I don't know why you don't care that I stay up crying over you. I don't know why you don't care that I actually love you. I don't elbow why you lie to me and tell me you love me too. I don't know why you lied. What do you get from it. What don't you understand. You can't play with peoples feelings like this. How is it okay for you to know I'm in love with you and you knowing you don't feel the same way. Don't you have any human emotion or compassion. Don't you know it's fucked up for you to continue doing this. How is it okay for you to lie to me. How is it okay for you to "not know" how you feel about me. How is it okay to tell me you love me when you don't know how. You don't want me. You don't want to be with me. What the fuck do you want. Why the fuck are you here. To hurt me? To fucking drive me insane? How you feel about me means a lot to me. And I was trying to be patient. But. You aren't in love with me. And I just want the truth. I want to know why you're still here. I want to know why you're doing this to me. Revenge? I hurt you so now you kill me? Following your exes. All your girls. Reading this like you care. Are you kidding me. Why do I deserve this? What the fuck do you think I deserve? You fucking lied. You're not changing for me. You want nothing to do with me. You've made it very clear you don't care about me. That you don't want me. That you don't feel the same I do. So why. Why me. What fucking bet did you take that you're so keen on winning. Why the fuck are you here. Torturing me. Leading me on. Hurting me. Fucking why. Why do I deserve that. To be played and lied to.
Why would you let me wait knowing you weren't in love with me. Knowing that I felt more than you did. Knowing that I cared more. Why would you let me stay here for you to hurt me. Why would you let me stay here. Knowing that you didn't want me.
