The Aftermath

72🥀

July 1997:
Justine

I can't believe I left all my fucking music back in L.A!

All the music I've recorded are all left at Def Jam, just chilling while I'm in here doing absolutely nothing. I was going to use one of my songs from the album I was supposed to release this year as one of my comeback song.

Y'all probably like just fly in L.A. and work on your music there.....but I ain't ready to go back to that chaos as yet. I'm going to need a lot of thinking to get my ass back out there as soon as possible.

But today was a very off day, I got a call from Puffy saying he want to a collaboration with him. I told him I would think about it, I ain't gonna say no at first because that man has become very successful, especially with song Mo Money Mo Problems.

I gotta be careful if I'm going to take the deal as well because next thing people gon' think I'm betraying Pac and I'm on some east coast shit......

First of all, I might be from the east coast but I ain't taking no sides......Hell I wasn't even taking any sides in the first place! I have both respect for the east and west coast!

It's only been two days since Pac took Brie and I'm just missing her already. I don't get to hear the crying, changing her nappy, feeding her, talking to her, putting her to sleep as well.....it's just weird when you're all alone in silence.

I did remember Pac saying I could visit one of the days if I wanted to see the baby more, but it's the fact of leaving Brie afterwards, I know she gon' be crying.

Snapping out of my thoughts, I heard a ringing noise in my head, thought I was hallucinating when I snapped out again to realise it was actually just the phone.

'Hello' I spoke

'Girl when you gon' take the offer' Faith asked

'Faith they just rung my ass like two hours again, I'm still thinking' I said

'Well hurry up because I think this the song for you' she said

'How you know?' I tested her

'Come over to bad boy and see for yourself' she said

'Not now Faith I'll come one of the days during this week'

'So that's a yes to working with Puffy?'

'Now don't get hyped I ain't said yes as yet' I said

......

I decided, why not? I'm not gonna sit in my house lonely.....

I was planning to change into a large T and jeans but my ass couldn't fit in them.

Ugghhh.....I gotta loose the weight now!

I was so upset, I was literally rummaging through my closet to find clothes that would fit me. I didn't want to put on my maternity clothes on either because they were ugly as fuck.

Damn why the hell I care if it's ugly, I'm only going to see Tupac and Brie.

Anyways, I put this white top on with this floral dress that used to fit me on my knees but now it fits me above. Left my hair curly and I did not care to put any make up on as I wasn't bothered to.

I started to run to my nightstand to get my car keys but just realised my ass got probation.

This shit starting to get annoying, I should've let them attack me right on the spot but at the same time would I even be alive today?

......

'OMG! Why you ain't tell me you were coming over?' He acted shocked

'Chill it ain't like you got a chick up in your place' I laughed but stopped when I saw this strange look on his face 'Why you ain't laughing, uh uh you better not have any hoe up in here with our child or Imma beat you and that bitch up' I threatened

'Chill I ain't got anyone here' he said

'Hmm....Alright' I walked straight passed him to see Brie

I didn't feel his presence follow behind me. He can stay there and stare but he ain't getting anything from me anytime soon.

'My ass ain't what you should be staring at' I said

'I like this weight on you' He said

'Pac, I'm fat' I told him

'Nah you ain't, you just got the right meat in all the right places' he licked his lips before biting his bottom teeth

'And What do you mean by that?' I asked him as he walked closer to me

It was like my feet was stuck in quick sand, I couldn't move!

'I don't gotta tell you, you know what I'm talking about and obviously you see me staring' his hand slowly whipped around my waist

Now God forbid my ass try something with him.....

I didn't stop him from what he was doing, I let him carry on, I don't know I probably must've just enjoyed the attention from him.

My back was eventually against the wall. He had this look on his face that I couldn't quite read, it look like he wanted to tell me something instead of doing things with him.

'Is everything alright?' I asked

'Yeah I'm fine' he replied back

I didn't feel quite convinced with his answer but if he says he is, his.....

He looked deep in my eyes, tugging my curls behind my ear, caressing my cheek.

I feel in his trap again, why the hell do I do this? I first tell myself I only see him as a best friend, then someone I wanna have a one night stand with, now I feel like I wanna have a relationship with him.......Why do I this way?

Our faces got closer as our lips nearly connected. Before we got a chance to close our eyes, we heard Brie crying from upstairs.

She must've been sleeping and she want something to eat.

'Ohh that must be Brie' I said as we awkwardly smiled at each other breaking away