My brother's best friend

Chapter 19 - kiss me

Lucas is in his bed. Shawn is on the couch and I'm in my room I'm watching Netflix, like I do when I'm bored.... I don't know why I can't fall asleep. It's 3 in the morning and I'm still awake.. I have work tomorrow. I have to go to sleep.

Oh, it's my birthday.. I forgot about that. To be honest I don't really like my birthday. Every birthday I'm Surrounded by so many people and I hate that.

This is going to be the first birthday in 4 years Shawn is here with me. It's going to be.... very awkward especially after everything that happened between us.

I turn off my phone and I just want to go to sleep and  to forget all about my birthday.

I turn the lights off and in that same moment my door opens. Oh my god. I turn the light back on and I sit on the bad covering my face with the blanket... I move the blanket a bit to see Shawn standing with the door half open.

"Jesus Christ you scared me" I say in relief. "Sorry I didn't mean to scare you" He says walking in my room and closing the door.

"What are you doing?" I ask. Shawn sits next to me. "Happy birthday" he says handing me over a box.

I look at the box and it's wrapped with a pink bow tie and a little note that says: be mine

I don't know how to react to that. That's so sweet.

"Oh my god. Shawn you shouldn't have" I say holding the box. "I know." He says. He looks at me with his beautiful, gorgeous, sparkly eyes and he smiles his amazing smile and I'm starting to blush.

I open the box he gave me and Oh My God!!!! Wait what? I thought it will be more exiting, but there is only headphones and a little iPod... this is weird.

"Shawn What is this?" I ask confused....  " 2 unpublished songs of mine that I wrote for you a few years ago..." he says. Wait what?! I'm so confused.. That makes me so happy and it makes my heart warm. He looks embarrassed and shy and I'm just in shock.

I look at him and I put the headphones on and Shawn takes the iPod and he connects the headphones to the iPod and he plays the songs

1: What if I told you a story -

2: my head is underwater -

I'm starting to cry I'm so emotional and oh wow. I can't even believe he wrote this... and for me.

"You don't like it?" He asks me as I'm taking the headphones out of my ears.

"I love it. Thank you Shawn so much" I say and I hug him.

I pull backwards and I look at him smiling at me and I'm smiling back all crying because he fucking wrote this for me.

We have a moment I can feel it. I'm leaning in, he is not pushing me away. I'm getting closer and closer and now Shawn just grans my face and kisses me.

I'm in heaven. Best. birthday. ever.

things are getting real hot real quick..
My eyes are closed and I can feel Shawn moving very slowly to my neck.. He is kissing me very gently but so passionately, I can feel him smirking on my neck as I let out a moan.. he continues to kiss me on the neck and I play a bit with his fluffy hair... he moves back to kissing me on the lips and he pushes me on the bed so he is laying on top of me.

Suddenly he stops. I open my eyes and he is still on top of me just looking at me. "What?" I ask out of breath. I never thought I would open my eyes to see Shawn on top of me. I have to say this feels good.

"Nothing, I should go. Goodnight" He says getting off me. "Wait Shawn" I say as I'm sitting on the bed. "What?" He turns around. I'm stuck. I don't know what to say..

"I'm confused" I say. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have shown you the songs.." he says. "Are you kidding me? These songs are the most amazing and incredible thing anyone has ever brought me. Shawn this is amazing! I will never be able thank you enough." I say standing up. Shawn takes a step backwards.

"Why are you suddenly pushing me away?" I ask. "We can't be together B. You know that. We need to keep things professional." He says.

I know that what he says has a point but kissing him felt so good that I'm not sure I care what other people think. "Yeah ok, but this is my birthday and you can't make me upset on my birthday. Right?" I ask. I get closer to him and he is still and I get closer to him.... and he takes another step backwards.

Ok now I'm getting hurt. "You don't even understand how much I What to kiss you right now. But we have to at least try to restrain ourselves." He says..

"Fine." I say. I wish things weren't as complicated. I can't believe he told me that he has feelings for me, that he wants to kiss me, but we can't be together. "Can you at least stay with me a bit longer?! Tell me about the party... what about Camila.." I say. Shawn smiles and we both sit on the bed and he starts to tell me all about the party and the drama that happened.