Emotions // Billie Eilish - (on hold)

Chapter Thirty-One

Billie had set my book down and was now facing me with a stern look on her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked, taking her hands in mine and pulling her into my lap.

She cuddled me as she spoke

"I'm going back on tour..."

"You can't leave..." I said tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

I know I can't keep her here with me and I knew I couldn't go on tour with her. It was a lose lose situation.

"I have too baby it's my job.. my mums gonna stay here with you and I'll FaceTime you every morning and night." She said as she got up off my lap and stood in front of me to look at me.

"How long for?"

"2 weeks.. then I'll be home for a week then I go again.. for another 2 weeks." She said looking at the floor.

"When do you leave...?" I said it but I knew I didn't want to hear the answer.

"Tomorrow night. I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry"

-

The time had come for billie to leave. Her and fin stood by the door with bags at there side.

Billie looked sad but I tried to look happy for her so she wouldn't feel bad for leaving. This two weeks apart would be the hardest thing I'd ever do, We hasn't been apart in months and I didn't like to be apart from her.

She embraced me in her arms, wrapping me tightly to the point I could hardly breathe. I didn't complain.

"I love you so much. I'll be back before you know it." She said as she pulled away.

A tear dropped from my eye at the realisation she was actually leaving. I tried so hard to keep it together but I just couldn't.

"Don't cry, I promise we'll talk every day, whenever you want! I know it's hard, I'm going to miss you so much." She cupped my face and kissed me. There was a sense of urgency as she depended the kiss leaving me breathless when we heard fin cough as she pulled away.

"Have fun. I love you." I said looking at the floor cheeks red and my voice cracking as I spoke.

"I love you too." She said as she walked out the door

With that, she was gone.

I walked up the stairs and entered the bedroom, I looked at billies stuff and ended up putting on a black hoodie that belonged to her. I climbed into bed and quickly fell asleep. It was only 6pm but I was shattered from all the emotions I'd been feeling all day.

-

I woke to the sound of my phone ringing, I quickly picked it up seeing billies name on the screen.
My face hitched into a smile and I clicked answer.

"Hi beautiful."

I heard billies voice echo threw the room

"Hey, How are you?? How is it there? Are you ok? Did you travel ok? Did you arrive safe? Are you feeling good?" I rambled. My mind suddenly panicking at the thought of something going wrong when I wasn't there.

"Lily.. calm down. I'm fine everything is good here."

"Ok. Are you sure?"

"Yes!" She laughed.

"Ok. What's the hotel like?" I said suddenly feeling calmer.

She continued to get up off the bed and give me a virtual hotel room tour.

-

It's been 3 days since billie left. I missed her so much. Last night I ended up crying on the phone to her, sobbing my heart out. We still had 10 days left..
Billie ended up staying on the phone with me till I fell asleep which was past 1am in the morning, she knew I needed her support, she didn't complain once. She showed me photos from the tour, she told me all about the fans she met, all about the places she was going until eventually I couldn't keep my eyes open.

I decided today I was going to go for a walk, so I quickly got dressed and headed out the door. It was spring weather and I made sure to take into account all the plants blooming and the amazing trees which were so bright and colourful ready for summer.

I must have been half way threw my walk when Billie called. It was 11am so this was a little late for her but today was her day off.

"Good morning." She yawned threw the phone.

"Morning." I laughed.

"Are you outside..?"

"Yeah I'm just going for a walk."

"Don't over do it.. please.." she begged.

"Don't worry I'm just going around the block, I ate some cauliflower cheese last night."

"That's good! I'm proud."

I was still trying really hard to be healthy, I was eating, but I was working out it made me feel better about eating. I made sure I only burnt half of what I ate though.

As I walked round the corner I noticed a girl wearing billies Merch. As soon as she saw me her face lit up.

I turned around and began walking the other way.

"Everything ok?" I heard billie ask, questioning my silence on the phone.

"Yeah, Yeah." I wasn't sure if I was trying to convince her.. or me.

"OH MY GOD THATS BILLIES GIRLFRIEND." The girl screamed as she started running my way.

"What's going on?" Billie asked, suddenly sounding stressed.

I ignored both as kept walking keeping my head down.

The girl soon caught up with me. She ran in front of me blocking my path. She had her phone in my face filming my every move.

"Omg your billies girlfriend! Are you talking to billie?? Can you tell her I'm a big fan! What's it like dating her?" The girl began rambling.

"I'm sorry I can't." I said turning around to walk away.

"Lily what's going on?.. Are you ok?.. babe?" Billie was trying to get my attention threw the phone but I was in panic mode. I ignored her and focused on my escape.

"Wait!" She cried running to catch up to me.

"Just a few questions." She continued standing in front of me again.

I was stuck. Anxiety began to rise and fill my veins.. I needed to get out of here now.

"Please let me leave." I half begged half demanded.

The girl still had her phone in my face when she responded "Jesus I thought celebrity's where meant to love there fans. I feel sorry for billie."

With that i hung up on billie and I shoved past the fan and ran. I wasn't about to listen to anything else she had to say to me.