Emotions // Billie Eilish - (on hold)

Chapter Fifty-Six

I slowly opened the door somewhat afraid of who would be on the other side.

I was struck by piercing blue eyes and blue hair and a bright smile.

"Billie?" I asked, in shock. As she jumped into my arms.

"Hi Babygirl" She said as I wrapped my arms around her, I was so in shock I started to cry, like I cry over anything.

She pulled away slightly so she could look me in the eyes.

"Don't cryyy!" She laughed slightly as she pulled me back into a hug. As she pulled away after a moment I wiped my tears with my sleeve a smile still on my face as I moved aside to let her in, shutting the door.

I took her hand and dragged her to my bedroom, nearly throwing her on the bed when we got there.

She laid on her back laughing at my eagerness. I shut the door before walking over to her. I stood looking at her for a moment, still in shock she was actually here.

She sat up slowly crossing her legs on the bed turning to me.

"Don't just stand there, come here!" She wined and I crawled into the bed next to her only for her to wrap her arms around me and drag me on top of her.

She started planting little kisses all over me whilst I buried my head into her neck.

"I missed you." I said muffled against her skin.

"I missed you too." She said as she took my face in her hands guiding my lips to meet hers.

"Don't worry, Maggie is sorting it out you'll be home soon I promise." She said as she kissed me again.

"I can't wait."

-

When I woke the next morning I felt different, I felt happier. Still In shock I rolled over to face Billie.

I moved some hair out of her face smiling at her before climbing out of bed to get ready.

I was dressed, teeth brushed just doing my hair in the bathroom when arms wrapped around my waist.

"Morning." Billie sung into my ear. I turned around to face her wrapping my arms around her neck.

"Morning." I said as I lent in to kiss her. I missed the feeling of her lips on mine.

"Go get ready and then we can do something." I smiled at her. She kissed me again before disappearing to the bedroom.

-

I sat on the sofa when billie came charging down the stairs like an excited child. I turned to peer over the back of the sofa as she came running to see me.

This time it was me laughing at her eagerness.

"Can we make pancakes.." she begged

"I'm not hungry, but you can." I said looking away from her at the ground trying to avoid the following words we'd have.

"Oh come on, baby it's just food.. it won't hurt you.. just a tiny little one? It's not going to do you any harm I promise.." she begged taking my face in her hands so I had to look at her. I thought about what she said for a moment.. it's just food..

"Pleaseee your body needs the fuel.. a tiny pancake won't hurt you.. please trust me." She kissed my nose  as she spoke.

"Ok.. just one.. a small one.." I said and her face lit up. Holding out her hand we walked to the kitchen.

I perched myself up on the work surface whilst Billie started cooking, it was something she enjoyed but She didn't get to do often with her working or being on tour all the time.

Billie turned around to grab something off the side next to me and I laughed noticing the batter on her nose.

"What..? What did I do?" She asked confused. I waved my hand for her to come closer and she did so. I wrapped my legs around her so she couldn't moved and wiped the batter off her nose with my hand licking it off my finger.

"It's meant to stay in the bowl." I laughed as I lent down to kiss her.

She laughed before walking back to her cooking. I pulled out my phone and recorded a video of her cooking before posting it to Instagram with the caption "chef Billie 💜"

"Go sit in the living room there nearly ready." She said

So I hopped off the counter and headed into the living room.

Moments later in came billie with 3 pancakes for herself with A chocolate spread pancake with strawberries and one for me with a small layer of chocolate and a few strawberries.

"Thank you. Love you." I smiled at her as she put the plate down infront of me.

Billie tucked in whilst I flicked threw the channels finding something on the tv to watch. I realised I was putting off the food. I settled on riverdale and cut up my pancake, hesitating before putting into my mouth.

It's just food. I reminded myself as I put it in a chewed.

Too many calories. Too fat, gonna gain tomorrow, you'll have to fast tomorrow. Do you want billie to hate you? You'll get fat. Go throw it up.

"Breathe.. it's not gonna hurt you." Billie reminded me. I focused on her not the voice in my head

"Talk.. about anything.." I asked as I put more pancake in my mouth.

"Did I tell you about the airport yesterday?" She asked and I shook my head, cutting up the pancake.

"It was so sweet, there where these fans waiting and they'd be outside for hours and they gave me these cute flowers and a painting. We talked for ages they where just so sweet. I forget they know me better then I know me sometimes." She continued telling me about the fans she met and about her tour.

By the time she was finished I realised I'd cleared my plate. Whilst I felt guilty I tried not to think about it.

"You did it." Billie smiled and I tried to smile back to her but the thoughts where strong. Billie pulled me into her side sensing my guilt as she wrapped her arms around me.

"So.. are we watching this crap?"  She said knowing what she would start, but knowing she would distract me.

"It's not crap!!" I half yelled.

"Ok ok ok sorry. This show." She laughed

"Fuck You. My shows better then your shit." I said playfully as I moved away from her.

"Ok whatever you say." She said pouting as she pulled me back into her side

I buried my head into her neck and she rested her head on top of mine. We sat in silence watching, every once and a while Billie would kiss my forehead or ask me if I was ok or cold. She cared about me and it made my heart swell. I loved her, a lot.