Lance: Keith where tf are you
Keith: I'm in the kkitchen
Lance: Why am I the only one sober here honestly
Hunk: I didn't drink that much
Lance: I watched you take like five shots back to back
Hunk: Righgt
Lance: I am not the responsible adult here
Lance: Why is Keith passed out on the kitchen table
Lance: He literally texted a minute ago
Pidge: Alcohol makes people woooozy Lonce
Lance: If you ever call me Lonce again I will find you
Hunk: ADam's cousin is here and she's so cute goDDAMN
Lance: Hunk don't swear you're too wholesome
Shiro: All of my children are so duenk
Lance: You're drunk too
Lance: That's it I'm taking you all home
Shiro: Thisi s my hosue
Lance: I don't care you're going to have a hangover and hate it in the morning
Lance: I'm getting some water for you all. Get off your phones and come to the kitchen
Lance: Hunk where'd you go
Hunk: I'm talking to the pretty girll
Lance: No sex because you're drunk and can't consent
Hunk: LiGhTen Up
Hunk: I'm aCE anyway
Lance: You'll thank me in the morning buddy
Lance: This is a mess
Lance: I'm not having a stag do when I get married I don't care
Pidge: Lonce you need alcohol
Lance: I also need my symptoms of depression to go away but you can't have both
Pidge: You're borign
Lance: Yeah right
Lance: Ffs why is Keith crying I thought he had passed out
Lance: Remind me to never have kids
Lance: You're all lucky I love you
YOU ARE READING
The Adventures of SpaceDad and Children
FanfictionA text fic following the lives of the Voltron paladins! TW: Homophobia, suicide attempt, brief mentions of self-harm/drug use/abuse/PTSD. I know this makes the story sound really angsty but I can assure you it's more humorous than sad! I mean, I wro...
